Alright James Toney. Your father was an original death fighter. There's no way we would ever doubt that. We all assume that he used to collect the spleens of fighters he defeated in an empty mayonnaise jar to put them on display atop his fireplace. If you were to steal James Toney's MMA playbook and the title of his gameplan says 'Knock this guy out with one punch', grab the nearest eraser and change it to 'Put on a gi and take some classes, please'. At the end of the page, put a little note telling him that future James Toney went back in time to give present day James Toney some tips. Oh, and while you're inside James Toney's house -- see what's in his fridge. If he has taquitos, I get first dibs.
Last weekend on Inside MMA, Rampage Jackson somewhat called out James Toney due to some words that were exchanged between the two at UFC 123 in Detroit. In an interview with FightHype, James Toney responds to Jackson's comments and it's every bit of amazing as you thought it would be.
"The only thing that the Fake Mr. T has to do is sign the contract. Rampage is a decent club fighter and if he thinks his club fighting style can match my skills, then he is crazy as hell"
"What? Is he mad because I called him an Uncle Tom or because I said Detroit wouldn't accept him? (Laughing) My boy said Rampage stayed in his room and they were in Auburn Hills. They knew better than to go to the D where I'm from. Rampage is still an Uncle Tom and I will go on record and say he is not dumb enough to stand and trade with me. Machida almost knocked him out, so what do you think I would do to him."
"Rampage is a black redneck. He better stick to hanging with them white boys and keep my name out of his mouth. I ain't hard to find; sign the contract!"
I hope we all live to see the day in which James Toney will host the Academy Awards. That's not asking a lot, it really isn't. Just stick the dude in front of a microphone with an audience of millions and after his two-hour rant about how he's an expert 'death warrior', then they could get on with the award show. If James Toney jacked the microphone from Taylor Swift, it would be followed by a lecture on how Beyonce Knowles will never be able to take him to the ground. Scientists should separate the brains of Wallid Ismail and James Toney so that each person gets a half of the other's brain. That's the only way trash-talking can truly elevate to the 4th dimension. [Source]