War Machine went from MMA fighter, to porn star, to fugitive, to reformed MMA fighter, to selling his kidneys on eBay, to being considered armed and dangerous, to dropping out of a fight due to staph infection, to MMA fighter who defeated Zach Light in the UK, to going to prison for a year in the course of only nine months. If you were to add 'stole a NASA Space Shuttle to fly to the moon' in that list, we all should not even be surprised by it. Enough of this Dos Equis guy, War Machine is the most interesting man in the world and he even has the verifiable evidence to prove it. Check out War Machine's most recent prison blog entry update and his concern of being 'bombed' by a fellow inmate.
"My sports agent came to see me this week so that we can get on the same page for my comeback. It was nice to see him. Man, it's getting closer and closer, really can't wait! Also this one retard, that called me out months ago at the old jail and then b*tched out, is here in the hole now. He saw me/recognized me and I'm pretty sure he's gonna sh*t bomb me... F*CK! I've sh*t bombed people before, even had one detonate on myself, but have never been bombed. I'm not looking forward to it, it's gonna be horrible! Nothing I can do either besides try and make a barrier so it doesn't come in my cell very far, then hurry and clean it up right away. Son of a b*tch! He's gonna be hurting if he does though cuz I got like 3 other dudes on my "team" and everyone hates him. At the end of the day though, I'll still be getting bombed, most likely more than once too. Anyway, that f*cking MRSA/abscess came back in my armpit and it hurts! I'm waiting to see the doc. still, f*cking medical attention here is horrible! I just wanna get that shit lanced and start antibiotics ASAP. I don't know why I got it twice now in here, WTF!? The 1st time I figured from shaving my armpit and getting some bacteria in a lil' cut or something, but I stopped that. I did run out of deodorant a couple weeks back and had to use the state shit they give out. Maybe it clogged the pores? F*ck! All I know is it's pain/uncomfortable and gives me a fever at night. Back to that guy, he came to my door and told me that when he gets out he's gonna come to my gym and shoot/kill me and then smeared sh*t all over my windows so I couldn't see the TV for like 12 hrs. F*cking idiot. Man I just wanna go home! Train, fight, and get on with my life. Never gonna do any stupid sh*t again, that sh*t just isn't worth it. F*cking jail is NOT the place to be man."
In short, prison sucks. It's a horrible place filled with a limited amount of freedoms. I watched every episode of Oz, so I'm well aware of this. Don't pull a War Machine, people. He'll be the first person to tell you this. [Source]