The universe hiccups. An arm goes numb in Albuquerque. A look at Holly Holm’s future, present and past.

UFC Women’s Bantamweight newcomer Holly Holm already has a broken arm, and she hasn’t even fought Rousey. Technically, she broke it on the way to a fifth-round victory at the April Legacy FC event in New Mexico.

But if you believe, as I do, that the universe speaks. That it bears witness to its cyclical nature through the language of symbols. And that events in time are like rings that pulse forwards and backwards, manifesting themselves in multiple expressions of a singular idea. If you believe all that, then this broken arm thing might be a problem.

Because somewhere in Plato’s collection of eternal forms, and in Carl Jung’s storage bin of eternal archetypes, there exists a perfect, immutable symbol of submission. The source code for Pedro Sauer’s humiliation of Mr. Utah in 1992, for Rickson Gracie’s 400 wins, and for Royce Gracie’s iconic surprise finish of Jason DeLucia at UFC 2. The armbar.

Consider the possibility that we live in a time when that eternal symbol is reaching its full expression. If time is indeed circular, and we have stumbled within direct proximity of the center point, the perfect source, the idea itself, that injury to Holly’s arm in April may be important. Like a tremor before an earthquake, it may be an accidental expression of something to come, a warning sign before the armbar apocalypse.

Sound ridiculous? Plug in your Chromecast, borrow your aunt’s password for HBO Go, and watch all eight episodes of True Detective. Throw some ice on that elbow and take in the psychedelic wisdom of alcoholic quasi-guru Rust Cohle.

“Why should I live in history?” he wondered. “Someone once told me, time is a flat circle. Everything we’ve ever done or will do, we’re gonna do over and over and over again . . .”

10 wins, 8 by armbar. Armbar armbar armbar armbar armbar armbar armbar armbar. Time is a flat circle. The universe hiccups. An arm goes numb in Albuquerque.

Alright, now that we’ve established that Holm’s arm injury at the Legacy FC event was a shadow precognition of Plato’s idea of the armbar, which has been given its end of days Messianic expression in Ronda Rousey, what can a girl do? Good question, and I think Rust has an answer. Watch some gifs of that armbar finish and prepare for release.

“You look in their eyes, even in a picture. Doesn’t matter if they’re dead or alive. You can still read them, and you know what you see? They welcomed it. Not at first, but right there in the last instant. It is an unmistakable relief, see, because they were afraid and now they saw for the very first time how easy it was to just let go.”

Or, maybe just ask for a warm up fight.


Published on July 17, 2014 at 4:53 pm
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