Stuff like the Dolce Diet seems foreign to a guy like Donald Cerrone. I mean, why should he be worrying about getting his protein and greens in, measuring out exact servings and monitoring health conditions when he can just eat handfuls of candy for energy, right? Donald Cerrone is a man of the people, that’s why. Donald Cerrone lives his gimmick of being a Cowboy, traversing the open roads of America in his RV with a Tempurpedic bed and his handheld Singer to mend his pants.
Donald Cerrone isn’t afraid to tell you that he mends his own pants, either. He’s a real man’s man. You know that real cowboys used to keep a needle and thread handy to mend their clothes, right? Because they were traveling the wilds and didn’t have the time or the money to go shopping, no, they would mend their clothes over an open campfire like real men. Of course, they didn’t have Milk Duds, Snickers, Twizzlers and Hot Tamales like Donald Cerrone does. That’s just the fringe benefits of 2014.
That makes Donald Cerrone the modern day cowboy, the man who chooses to keep his horses under the hood in his RV and trades in a saddlebag for a roomy RV filled with candy and comfortable beds. He’s still a goddamned cowboy, though. Tomorrow night he fights Jim Miller in Atlantic City and I’ll be damned if that isn’t one of the best fights on paper for this year thus far.
