UFC, Stockton-Style: 11 Times Nate Diaz Moved the Needle

UFC president Dana White recently said a lot of made-up things about Stockton-born badass Nate Diaz last week, but most baffling of all was the claim that Diaz the Younger doesn’t move “the needle” with fans.
 
We here at MiddleEasy don’t need to tell you how false that sounds, and shame on Dana for his lies.
 
But rather than whip out charts and graphs about TV ratings and all that noise, we’re just going to show you the evidence. Not only does Nate Diaz move the needle, these are the 11 times he threw it through the goddamn wall.
 

11.)UFC Cuts Nate From Their Bulls*** Rankings, MMA World Explodes 

Even though the UFC rankings were on TV and being used to make matches, nobody really cared until Nate Diaz got bounced from the lightweight list.
 
That was when everyone started paying attention, though, forcing the UFC to make up rules about “activity” on the fly just to save face.
 

10.) Nate Wins The Ultimate Fighter 5

 
Remember when this show mattered?
 
Maybe it’s more accurate to say “Nate Diaz Beats the F*** Out of All the Sorry Motherf***ers Stuck in the TUF House With Him,” but we’re not going to split hairs here. Diaz—amazingly enough—was one of the calmer fighters in the house that year, saving up his aggression for next-level beatdowns and winning the whole thing.
 
You wouldn’t have blamed Nate for losing it and smothering someone in the night, either. Karo Parisyan was being a huge d**k, B.J. Penn was making everyone else cry, and guys were running around wearing thongs on Week Two.
 
God, TUF sounds like a nightmare.
 

11.) Nate Humiliates Kurt Pellegrino 

 
Bad: Getting caught in a triangle.
 
Worse: Getting caught in a flying triangle.
 
Way Worse: Getting caught in a flying triangle and getting caught so deep that Nate has time to flip you off without even cranking in the choke.
 

8.) Nate Chokes Out Melvin Guillard

 
True story: Melvin Guillard’s own training partners have said that he’s just too stupid to learn Jiu-Jitsu.
 
You know what else is stupid? Trying to set up a takedown by playing dope-a-rope. This isn’t boxing, Melvin. Shame on you.
 

7.)Nate Outclasses Jim Miller 

 
If there was one BJJ guy in the UFC who could’ve submitted Nate Diaz, it would’ve been Jim Miller. Unfortunately for him, every fight starts on the feet, and he ate a few dozen Stockton-flavored shots to the mouth on the way to the mat.
 

7.) Nate Avenges Nick, Taps Takanori Gomi 

 
Lots of rules in MMA are stupid as Hell, but few are dumber than MMA fighters getting fined and suspended over marijuana. That’s not a performance enhancer in any way, if you know anything about the drug.
 
Hell, Nick Diaz should’ve just been given an honorary PRIDE Championship for being high in the first place.
 
But good ‘ol Nate made up for that robbery after four long years, stopping Gomi with a Round-One Rousey Special when he probably could’ve just won by KO.
 

5.) Nate Calls Miesha Tate’s Boyfriend a ‘F*g’

Look, we’re not condoning Nate’s use of the F-word (no, we don’t mean f*ck), but you’ve got to admit that Bryan Caraway is what some would say is a complete tool. Like, it’s part of MMA history that Caraway is a total prick, since he hates weed, wants to fight women, and begs Dana for money he didn’t earn.
 
But Nate had a stance, and he paid 20,000 big ones to make it. ‘Gotta wonder what the UFC charges a non-needle-mover.
 

4.) Nate Brutalizes Gray Maynard 

 
Just to remind everyone, Nate tried to prevent this from happening. Maybe he somehow knew how hard he was going to batter what was left of Gray Maynard’s brain, but let the record show that he gave him an out.
 
Instead, the UFC put the match together anyway and Nate went to work, winning his series against the “Bully” and setting a new record for “how hard can you beat a man against a fence” in the process.
 

3.) Nate Cuts Greatest Post-Fight Interview in History

 
What’s that, Jon Anik?
 
You have questions?
 
Aw, that’s adorable, but you’re not needed here.
 

2.) Nate Immortalizes Donald Cerrone Rivarly 

 
About the only thing that could’ve made this victory better is if Nate knocked out Cerrone with one hand, just holding that middle finger in front of his face all the way down.
 
What we got at UFC 141 was still pretty good, though, and we can’t even decide if the best part of the whole thing was Nate smacking away Cerrone’s hat.
 
 

1.) The Strikeforce Brawl 

Sure, most photos of that infamous MMA event in Nashville only show Nick and Jake Shields, but Nate was right in the mix, adding to the 100-man pile up that went down when Jason Miller stuck his face in the cage.
 
Hell, if you watch the tape, Nate actually pushes Shields out of the way just to get to Miller, throwing his hat and shooting for a takedown in the middle of like 10 guys. 
 
So yeah, for a guy who doesn’t move the needle, it’s pretty convenient that he’s only a major player in one of the most memorable post-fight brawls in combat sports history. 
 
Published on July 23, 2014 at 7:19 pm
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