Let’s all sit around the fireplace to hear what Shane Carwin has to say…

Nearly every picture you find on the net of Shane Carwin he generally has his hand up since, well…the guy has never lost. Carwin has a flawless record of 12-0 and even at this point in his career, Fedor Emelianenko already had a loss chalked up on his MMA record. I’m sure this won’t be the last time the current UFC interim heavyweight champion of the world will be compared to The Last Emperor. Last August, we interviewed Shane Carwin just when he was about to bang against Brock Lesnar for the UFC heavyweight belt. This was before Brock Lesnar’s magical resurrection after his intestine literally leaked out of his stomach. We’re talking about back in the day folks, when we were asking Carwin how he felt about Strikeforce: Carano vs. Cyborg bout. Since then, Brock Lesnar vs. Shane Carwin has been on tap a total of three times. It’s rumored that the fight will now take place July 3rd at UFC 116 in Las Vegas.

Since MiddleEasy was ranked numero uno in Shane Carwin’s Top Ten MMA sites (we’re still doing backflips), we thought it would be time to catch-up with The Engineer and see just how chaotic his life has been since he knocked out Frank Mir in stunning fashion at UFC 111.

When you went back to work after your UFC 111 victory over Frank Mir, did the office have cake and ice cream for you or was it one of those ‘Alright man, that’s really cool. But we need you to work on this project’?

“For me, I was ready to get back to work. I went in Monday following the Mir fight like it’s what I was supposed to do. The board of directors and a few executives had brought in family members to meet me and take pictures but I was back at my desk by 9am working hard.”

If after all these months you still fail to realize that Shane Carwin’s nickname is actually his profession, then maybe you need Ron Kruck to take a visit to your house and slap you in the face with some Inside MMA. Shane Carwin is an engineer for a potable water district and he runs and develops the hydraulic model which is a computer replication of the distribution system. I had to copy and paste that from a previous article because that sentence is filled with words are entirely too sophisticated for me. So what project are you working on?

“I am pretty full time on the hydraulic model but I have a few other projects that’s for designing new infrastructure. Currently working on a 16″ water line.”

Sixteen inches of water line goodness. Whenever I think of cylinders that can hold liquid, I’m always reminded of the days in which a twelve-pack of Bud Light was my best friend (that was pretty much every day of college). So I have to know, that picture you took the night you won the UFC interim heavyweight belt, did those Bud Light cans signify anything?

“Not at all, I like the product. I am not sponsored by them and Dana did not tell us that we could only drink Bud Light, it is just what we drink. The belt was laid down, beers were ordered by my coaches and when I woke up the beers and belt had come together.”

Alright Carwin, we still think you were trying to make a point. So where is the exact location of the belt right now?

“Yikes I do not know. I think at home in the closet.”

Since everyone is still amped up on the Anderson Silva fiasco that was UFC 112, If Brock Lesnar pulls an Anderson Silva on you and starts dancing around the octagon and calls you ‘Mamma’s Boy’, what would you do to remedy that?

“Brock is a man and I expect he will fight like one. This is not 6th grade, we both want to fight.”

We still refuse to believe that Shane Carwin is human. Personally, I still think he originates from a long lineage of aliens from the Planet Krypton and everytime he points up after he wins, he’s just giving a shout-out to his family. A lot of conspiracy theorists say that the world’s current technological revolution was based on government scientists reverse engineering alien technology. Now hypothetically, if an alien craft crash landed on earth, would it even be possible to reverse engineer it?

“I think so, reverse engineering is easier then building a flying saucer from scratch.”

My dad is an old school engineer, been doing it all his life. After I told him you won at UFC 111, he immediately wanted to know if you ever drafted on a board in your engineer career. Yeah you just knocked out the former UFC heavyweight champion, but the most pertinent question on his mind was if you were a drafter.  Like I said, he’s an old school guy.

“In class they taught us on boards so when I graduated, it was still required learning. That being said, my job is very CAD based so software is predominant in the industry.”

My dad has been working on this perpetual motor concept for years now. He believes that he can design an engine that is completely autonomous and doesn’t require any added energy to operate. Do you believe perpetual motion is possible?

“No”

Damn, alright. Well I’ll just tell him not to read this part of the interview. Well would it be possible to make a motor entirely constructed of magnets that could power itself?

“We can try. I can tell you that a MMA management company named Magnetic Marketing Associates has been my engine for over a year now and it is the best running engine out there.”

We have to admit, that was pretty slick. Back to Brock Lesnar and your upcoming title fight. There’s a picture floating around the net of you holding your fist next to Brock Lesnar’s. It looks like you could fit his entire fists in yours. You think he noticed?

“Brock doesn’t strike me as a guy that gets worried about things like that. He and I have spent our whole lives competing and I am certain he is looking at the big picture and putting together a camp and plan to win this fight.”

Agreed, screw Brock Lesnar for the time being. Shane, you’re an engineer. How do you think the levees could have been built in New Orleans in order to prevent the Hurricane Katrina disaster?

“I think the honest answer is that our government failed the people of New Orleans. They knew of the problem and never found the funds to fix it. I have a feeling if it was Beverly Hills or DC the levee work would have been a priority. Tragedies are accidents that could have been avoided.”

Final question, the Mayan Calendar predicts the end of the world on 2012. What do you think is going to happen?

“Have not been to the calendar store since I was left off Greeley’s Sexiest Men Calendar, so I can’t comment.”

And that’s why Shane Carwin should be your favorite fighter. Props to Jason at Magnetic Marketing Association for setting up the interview.

Published on April 16, 2010 at 10:12 pm
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