Frank Shamrock cried every morning for two weeks prior to his retirement

When I lived in North Carolina, I met this guy at a bar (not in that way), let’s just call him John ‘the so obvious compulsive liar’. Dude had a tattoo of the Frank Shamrock logo on his back and showed me a pink laminated card in his pocket that certified him as a black-belt in muay-thai. I wanted to just hailstorm on his parade and inform him you don’t get belts in muay-thai but listening to this guy talk was entirely too entertaining. He told me that he beat Chris Horodecki at IFL (and no, his name wasn’t Ryan Schultz or Anthony Njokuani, the only two guys to hand Horodecki an L in his MMA career). He continued to tell me that I could join IFL if I continued to work out. I’m not sure if he realized the IFL has been extinct for nearly two years now, but once again, you can’t let the truth get in the way of a good liar. Towards the end of the night, he tried to show me some BS move that involved holding my arm out for an extended amount of time while he placed his thumb around my wrist and did absolutely nothing. I tried to tell him that I just wanted to drink my cosmopolitan and watch the premiere of TUF 10 but he insisted that I get up so he can demonstrate some move he saw in a Jean-Claude Van Damme movie. For anyone who thinks I made this up, here’s a picture to prove it.

My only wish in this infinite universe is that one day, this guy will get smacked in the head by Chris Horodecki, Ryan Schultz, Anthony Njokuani and Frank Shamrock simultaneously. Until that day comes, we have to rely on Ben Fowlkes of MMAFighting to interview Frank Shamrock regarding his decision to retire from MMA, and yes, it involves habitual crying.

“Trust me, I cried every morning for two weeks over this, because I knew I had to go out there and say the words that would end my journey. That was the hardest thing I ever had to do, but it was the right thing to do. If some of these other guys would search their souls, they’d also know it’s the right thing to do.”

Frank Shamrock resides at the top of a very short list of people I won’t plan on stealing chili from in the near future. When Frank Shamrock retired at the HP Pavilion this past weekend, I stood on my chair in the media row just to give Shamrock the utmost respect. An usher tapped me on my shoulder and told me to not do that anymore or else he’ll have to remove me from the arena. Story of my life. [Source]

Published on June 28, 2010 at 3:21 pm
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