Last night, FEG announced a partnership with Fuji TV to broadcast a portion of their events in 3D. In order to get everyone to hop on the bandwagon, they invited Peter Aerts and Semmy Schilt to watch a K-1 broadcast in 3D complete with those little plastic glasses. The entire event was streamed and it consisted of Peter Aerts continuously taking off his glasses, readjusting them and then putting them back on. FEG then announced that the K-1 World GP this weekend will be shot in 2D and 3D and they will be negotiating with satellite and cable providers later this year to broadcast Dynamite!! 2010 in 3D. Since 3D just won’t satisfy some, let me take you guys to the foreseeable future of television: 10D-TV.
Pretty soon, your cable provider will offer 4th dimensional television in which you will be able to see the progression of time illustrated in some weird elongated tube similar to that scene in Donnie Darko. When television hits 5D, we will be able to see every possible outcome of each fighter. For example, if we were to watch Dynamite!! 2009 in 5D, we would have seen Aoki breaking Hirota’s arm and Hirota breaking Aoki’s arm simultaneously. In 6th dimensional television, if a fighter is not happy with the outcome of a fight they will technically be able to fold the 5th dimension into the 6th and ‘go back in time’ to change his/her actions in the fight to yield a different result. If we all live long enough to witness the emergence of the 7D-TV, it would treat each fight as a single point in space. This point would represent the beginning of the fight and all it’s possible outcomes. Essentially, it would be called ‘the point of infinity’ which would be all possible timelines that could have or would have occurred from the start of the fight. Now in 8th dimensional television, infinity only plays a small role. If you were to watch a fight on your snazzy 8th dimensional television set, you would be able to witness different infinities created with different initial conditions. For example, if we were to assume that the start of the fight is the beginning of a dimensional timeline that would cease to exist at the end of the fight, then in 8D-TV, viewers can see an entirely new universe in which the fight will occur. In this scenario, an MMA fight may start off in Pride rules, fighters may be able to equip weapons in the ring or humans may have developed an extra appendage to beat their opponent with. This will create an infinity that is different from the infinity that is normally associated with the fight. In 9th dimensional television, fighters would be able to jump from one infinity to the next. If Ubereem isn’t happy with his gargantuan size, he can jump to another universe/infinity in which the gravity on earth is lower which will enable him to grow to immense portions and be an even bigger favorite with fanboys on The UG. Finally, if society ever got to witness 10th dimensional television, it gets a little bit tricky. 10D-TV would represent all the possible timelines from all the possible universes from all the possible infinities and treat it as one point. We’re not sure what that would look like on your television but it will most likely result in your TV exploding in pieces of charred shrapnel. Thank you Rob Bryanton for telling me everything I ever needed to know about the 10th dimension.
