In Tucson, Arizona there’s a giant sign painted on the back of someone’s house that says ‘Happiness is Submission to God’. If you’ve ever attended the University of Arizona, you know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s at the corner of Euclid and 6th next to that liquor store that accepts fake IDs. The sign never specifies what submission from God brings happiness. Perhaps this means any submission from God, in which case I would like God to submit me via Aokiplata. Good luck pulling that one off. The only higher being that can execute that submission rocks technicolor pants and occasionally wears funny glasses.
Now it looks like not even God can use the word ‘submission’. Sorry Jesus, that word is owned by ZUFFA now and if you try using it in any one of those fancy religious texts, you’re going to have to deal with their legal team.
In today’s UFC press-release, I noticed at the end of the email ZUFFA has now claimed the word ‘Submission’ as a registered trademark.
Ultimate Fighting Championship®, Ultimate Fighting®, UFC®, The Ultimate Fighter®, Submission®, As Real As It Gets®, Zuffa®, The Octagon™ and the eight-sided competition mat and cage design are registered trademarks, registered service marks, trademarks, trade dress and/or service marks owned exclusively by Zuffa, LLC and licensed to its affiliated entities and other licensees in the United States and other jurisdictions. All other marks referenced herein may be the property of Zuffa, LLC, its affiliates or other respective owners.
Gone are the days when another promotion can refer to a rear-naked choke as a win ‘via submission’. I guess we need to get used to a ‘win via squeezy’ or something equally as ignorant.
Update: It looks like ZUFFA has claimed the word ‘Submission’ for a while now. Still amazing nonetheless.