One day I’m going to release a feature on MiddleEasy entitled ‘Sh*t Bobby Razak texted me’ and it will garner an innumerable amount of page views and consequently break the MiddleEasy server. I’ll then blame Bobby Razak for screwing with the site, hold a grudge of mythical proportions, and we will never talk again. In order to exact revenge, I’ll break into his place one night and steal all of his Star Wars memorabilia and then strategically place evidence so he will be under the impression that Amanda Lucas robbed his place. Razak will confront Lucas with his erroneous allegations, which will force her to crush his head into lego-sized pieces — and I will stand on top of a mountain with my arms raised to celebrate my ultimate victory.
Damn, that’s a hell of an introduction to a short-film. Beat that Academy Awards. You can’t. Now give me one of those golden Oscars so I can fool my next door neighbor into believing that I have the mutant ability to shrink people into mini statues.
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