Junior Dos Santos gets the title shot he was promised, again

After years of endless debates over a half-empty keg and thousands of thread posts later, Junior Dos Santos vs. Cain Velasquez will finally go down — and it will be for the UFC heavyweight title. Rejoice, bake cookies — do whatever you deem fit in order to build up hype for one of the most anticipated heavyweight bouts since Fedor Emelianenko vs. Mirko Cro Cop back in 2005.

Tonight we realized that Shane Carwin’s head is impervious to any physical object that has ever existed on our planet. Scientists could use Carwin’s skull to alter the trajectory of an asteroid if one were ever aimed directly towards the earth. It’s just impossible to knock the guy out. We realize this. Humanity realizes this. Junior Dos Santos emptied the contents of his arsenal in Shane’s direction but it just wasn’t enough to get the finish.

Props to Junior Dos Santos for grabbing the win without the use of Steven Seagal, although I’m sure Blackhouse will utilize the Under Siege star in the very near future. At least we can only hope so.

Published on June 12, 2011 at 3:44 am
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