Last night seemed to be just another prophecy in which the Nostradamus of MMA, Conor McGregor had revealed to him in one of his many tomes. At the 2016 World MMA awards, McGregor was so sure he’d win Fighter of the Year that he had pre-recorded an acceptance video in the only way McGregor could record one.
After receiving the award, Conor McGregor revealed himself to his loving masses by beaming out his disembodied head like he was straight Zordon from the Power Rangers about to address some world-ending shit. Alpha 5 was somewhere freaking out. McGregor proceeded to absolutely tear into everyone mercilessly in a very, matter-of-fact, yet casual way. But when you’re the king, you must rule with an iron fist and not mince words.
It was clear that McGregor’s mind is burdened by the responsibility of putting food in the mouths of all the fighters in the UFC and trying to collect mass quantities of gold. Yes, the Irish man wants wealth, but wants it for himself and others. He not only wants to change everyone’s bum lives, he needs to since everyone else is so underpaid.
You heard it here first, True Believers: Conor McGregor will eventually win Humanitarian of the Year. It won’t stop there. If McGregor keeps this up, he’ll be nominated for the Noble Peace prize. McGregor will be knighted. As a supremely enlightened being most likely proficient in the art of conscious dying, I wouldn’t even be surprised if McGregor was found to be the next Dalai Lama. And finally, when he passes away from this plane of existence, McGregor’s mortal coil will be canonized into sainthood and become a reliquary hoards of worshipers can visit in Vegas.
Please be humbled and enjoy the broadcast from our gracious lord, uploaded by none other than UFC fighter Mike Jackson here: