Conor McGregor types these things. In the battle for public opinion Conor McGregor just cracked the UFC in the skull with a right hand. Two days after McGregor tweeted he retired, he released a statement that he is not retried and ready to battle at UFC 200.
Wait, what?
Like a serial killer composing a ransom note, lets decode and try to decipher what McGregor really meant to say in his official response to the UFC pulling him off the UFC 200 card. Here are the top nine secret messages hidden within Conor McGregor’s not retried Facebook post.
9. “I am just trying to do my job and fight here. I am paid to fight. I am not yet paid to promote. I have become lost in the game of promotion and forgot about the art of fighting.”
McGregor code for – “These custom-made suits aren’t cheap. This solid gold pocket watch, three people died making this watch. I need to put people away. I need those big fights. I’m going to end up in debt pretty fast.”
8. ” 50 world tours, 200 press conferences, 1 million interviews, 2 million photo shoots, and at the end of it all I’m left looking down the barrel of a lens, staring defeat in the face, thinking of nothing but my incorrect fight preparation. And the many distractions that led to this.”
McGregor means – “I should create my own belt. I am, in myself, my own belt. It doesn’t matter if its featherweight, lightweight, welterweight. It’s the McGregor belt. That’s it, I’m fighting for my own belt.”
7. ” Talking to some lady that deep down doesn’t give a fuck about what I’m doing, but just wants some sound bites so she can maybe get her little tight ass a nice raise, and I’m cool with that too, I’ve been giving you all raises. But I need to focus on me now.”
McGregor thinks -” “The man’s afraid to look me dead in the eye. So he put a frame out in front of him and I quickly snatched it and broke his wrist … because I’m a don, and that’s what dons do. My socks are worth more than the whole suit you had on, you little bum. You broke b—-. I could buy and sell you one hundred times over.”
6. ” There had been 10 million dollars allocated for the promotion of this event is what they told me. So as a gesture of good will, I went and not only saved that 10 million dollars in promotion money, I then went and tripled it for them. And all with one tweet.”
McGregor’s gospel states – “I didn’t have money before this. I was collecting 188 Euro a week off the social welfare. And now here I am, with like 60 G’s bonus and then my own pay. I don’t know what the F’s going on, to be honest, right?”
5. ” I must isolate myself now. I am facing a taller, longer and heavier man. I need to prepare correctly this time. I can not dance for you this time. It is time for the other monkeys to dance. I’ve danced us all the way here.”
McGregor’s monkey business – “I’d love a monkey, maybe a chimpanzee. Just a cool chimpanzee whipping around.. that would be unbelievable. I tell you what, I’ll come back next time with my brand new chimpanzee.”
4. ” He came in with no shit to do that last one. I’d already done press conferences, interviews and shot the ads before RDA pulled out. Maybe I’ll hit Cabo this time and skull some shots pre-fight with no obligation.”
McGregor claims – “The only approach I changed is I dug the grave a little bit wider. A little bit longer for Nate’s skinny, fat, long body.”
3. ” I feel the $400million I have generated for the company in my last three events, all inside 8 months, is enough to get me this slight leeway. I am still ready to go for UFC 200.”
McGregor logic – ” The only weight I give a f*** about is the weight of the cheques and my cheques are super-heavyweight.”
2. ” If this is not enough or they feel I have not deserved to sit this promotion run out this one time, well then I don’t know what to say.”
McGregor’s crazy eyes read – “Look into my eyes. Little Brazilian. Você vai morrer (meaning you are going to die).”
1. “For the record also – For USADA and for the UFC and my contract stipulations -I AM NOT RETIRED.”
McGregor ponders – “We’re not just here to take part — we’re here to take over.”
