Want to watch a few dozen brutal knockouts? Alright, here’s some old-school ultraviolence

Hopefully one day science will be able to create clones made from the DNA of our favorite fighters purely for the sake of furthering science and competing. The clones will be 100% pure, with no additives or chemicals and they will be forced to fight in their determined weight class until they are recycled for materials — except for 2004 era BJ Penn, who will take matches with everyone all the way up to Mark Hunt. He’ll win most of them too.

Speaking of scrapping. If cloning is real (and cheap) in the future, BJ Penn should start a Hawaiian scrapbooking business with his crew of prodigies. Imagine that; a warehouse full of Baby Jays with their heads down making scrapbooks for their company, Just Scrap: BJ’s Scrapbooks and Keepsakes. The thought of that makes me almost as happy as this old-school highlight reel reminding us of the violence of yesteryear. Apparently this is the first episode in what will be an ongoing series, but I ask you this video creator: where are the wild 90’s? You know, with the parachute pants?

Thanks to KickYoNuts for the find.

Published on May 1, 2013 at 5:26 pm
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