I’ve never competed in one of those $500 bikini hot body contests at the local dive bar but I can imagine if I did and lost to a girl with obvious fake porn star boobs, mystic spray on tan and a Brazilian butt lift that I’d probably feel better about myself than if I lost to some chick who was just naturally gifted with an arse you can put your dinner plate on and giant perky knockers. After the loss I’d probably start coming up with all sorts of reasons why I am sure the winner was a walking piece of human Tupperware. I’d convince myself that had every part of the winner’s body NOT been injected with the fix a flat stuff you put into your tire when you get a leak that I would have been victorious. Anything to keep my brain from accepting the reality that I am just not bikini hot body contest winning material.
Brandon Vera seems to feel the same way about his recent loss to Thiago Silva at UFC 125. On a recent episode of Ryan Loco’s show Vera talked about the controversy surrounding Silva’s UFC 125 drug test results and if the results do come back positive for PEDs how it will make him feel.
“I have no idea what’s going on,” Vera stated on the latest episode of The Ryan Loco Show. “He could’ve tested positive for marijuana. I honestly don’t think that’s a performance enhancing drug. If he does test positive for some kind of strength enhancing substance, it would make me feel a little bit better about myself.”
“I roll with Phil Davis,” Vera said. “I roll with Travis Browne. I roll with Junior Dos Santos. I roll with the Nogueira brothers. When I’m in the half guard underneath somebody and I have their leg, and my other leg’s half-cocked up on their arm pit, I can rock people back and forth. I can rock you and either stand back up or get the sweep…I remember when I was underneath him and I was pushing him back and forth. I was thinking, ‘What the hell? Why is this guy so damn strong?’ And I remember thinking during the fight, ‘Yo, I gotta start lifting weights again.’ He was one of, if not the strongest dudes I ever rolled with in my life. Strong b******.”
“There’s stuff I want to say about you, Thiago,” Vera said. “You know, I’m glad you were happy winning the way you were. It’s cool, man. It’s cool. If this thing comes back and you did do whatever you did and I make it back to the UFC, on your welcoming back party, I want to make sure I’m the one you get to fight.
“And I promise if you take me down, I’m going to get back up. Then I’m going to punish you on the feet just like I did while we were fighting, until you took me down. Then you gave it to me, but you won’t take me down next fight. So I’m glad you got to showboat. I’m glad you got to win, kind of. But I’m gonna see you again soon, bud.”
Whoa. Brandon Vera does not sound happy about his loss. I can sympathize with that, I lost at Roller Derby tryouts yesterday to a chick that is built like Cris Cyborg and must have had nitrous oxide tanks attached to her skates. Its cool, I don’t give up that easily I know I have better knee socks and the next time tryouts come around Cyborg look alike girl, I will have on my own rocket skates and knee socks and I will see you again. [Source]