Bladow! This is the 5,000th article on!

5,000 friggin’ articles. My god. I don’t think I’ve done 5,000 of anything. Maybe, in a drunk eating frenzy at a Chinese buffet I consumed 5,000 grains of rice, but that’s it. I wish I had something planned for you guys, some remarkable 5,000th article blowout to appease all of you with. Alas, this article along with the above banner is the best I can do.

After Strikeforce: Overeem vs. Werdum this past weekend, I found myself backstage with Josh Barnett eating from a mountain of desserts. We both grabbed a brownie and said a cheers to his victory over Brett Rogers and for the continued success of MiddleEasy, a site he reads daily. I would have never imagined my life coming to a point in which the previously mentioned moment would become a reality.

MiddleEasy began on May 2nd 2009, the night of Sengoku 8. I was so inspired by Omigawa (and so amped up on cheap energy drinks) that I created the entire site in one sitting. It took about six hours, and by 10:00am the next morning, it was all done. Back then I lived in North Carolina, worked at an incredible marketing firm and I lived on a golf course. Life was baller — but let’s face it, it was North Carolina. What does that state even mean in the greater context of the universe?

I left everything, threw away most of my stuff, packed my car and drove across the country to Hollywood, CA (all the while maintaining and updating the site). When I finally arrived in California, I slept on my lesbian friend’s sofa for nearly a month. She had a cat that liked to vomit over my jeans. It was a ridiculous living situation, but it ultimately enabled MiddleEasy to be what it is today. Well, that and a hell of a lot of energy drink fueled all-nighters.

Since the beginning of MiddleEasy, the site has gone through four major redesigns, two successful malicious hacks (damn you Poland), six server upgrades and an innumerable amount of unintentional typos. Now, things are awesome — and they’re only getting awesomer, rawesomer. This summer we’re doing some incredible stuff that I absolutely know you will enjoy. The success of MiddleEasy is due to all of you that continue to read the site. Without you guys, I would be typing all of this witty nonsense to an audience of spam bots that just want to push their replica handbags on the site.

In short, thank you, thank you, thank you. I can’t say that enough. You guys are awesome and whenever we can show the love back, we do so in the form of contests — or by just generally give away stuff for no apparent reason. King Mo told me that if you don’t have haters, then you’re doing something wrong. Apparently a small minority out there are offended by the way we present MMA news. That’s just what we do. We don’t strive to be different, we just are. We’re the guys that were in the back of the classroom planning out their guild name in ‘Everquest’. I didn’t even go to my senior prom for the sole reason that there was a ten-hour long kung-fu marathon airing the same night. We’re not meatheads or people that have something to prove. We just make dope stuff, and we love doing it. That’s it.

Carl Sagan once said ‘If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch. You must first invent the universe.’ I’m not sure how that quote applies to this article, but Carl Sagan is just the friggin’ man. He needed a shout-out today.

That’s all I really have to say. We love the world, and in a perfect MiddleEasy universe, there would be no wars and no hate. People wouldn’t be impoverished nor would they feel discriminated against based on factors they have no control over. The entire planet would be one giant MMA arena and scientists would invent a cloning method to reanimate prominent figures from history and see how they would perform under a Pride FC ruled fight. That’s the world I want to live in, and nachos would be provided in the stands for free.

Remember, you can always follow MiddleEasy on Twitter and Facebook if you so desire. Thank you for everything, people. You make getting carpal tunnel syndrome worth it.

Published on June 20, 2011 at 7:20 pm
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