And now for a brief musical interlude
*Rolls opening credits*
♫ Breaking through the MMA clouds, fly away (fly away),
The panorama broadens throughout the knocked out bodies.
Kicked in the face, the Earth gets angry (angry),
Making blood volcanoes explode. ♫Right in the melted ice of North-South position Pole,
If there’s a young Vitor Belfort dinosaur, I’ll train it to balance it on the ball.♫ Cha-La Head-Cha-La ♫
Whatever happens to the feelings of a moody keyboard warrior.
♫ Cha-La Head-Cha-La ♫
As long as my heart beats loud,
Shouting out Genki Sudo… Sparking!Swooping through the sky on the Rogan Coaster (Rogan Coaster),
I fell in the paradise of panic.
The scenery turns upside-down and I’m pleasant (pleasant),
Even the mountains look like rear-naked chokes.There’s no time to worry,
I’ll lurk and say “Reebok!” while meeting out of somewhere.♫ Cha-La Head-Cha-La ♫
I’d rather empty my head and stuff it with corn nuts.
♫ Cha-La Head-Cha-La ♫
With a smiling Ultimate Fighting-Z,
Even today goes Aye-yi-yi-yi-yi♫ Cha-La Head-Cha-La ♫
Even if I am awake like a keyboard warrior.
♫ Cha-La Head-Cha-La ♫
♫ As long as my heart beats loud,
Shouting out Genki Sudo… Sparking! ♫
Previously on Middle Easy Z: The worlds of MiddleEasy and Dragon Ball Z have fused together to form a singular identity and a brand new universe.
With the realms of MMA and DBZ set for a speeding 2,016 MPH fiery collision course, Earth’s best martial artists crossed over to the Dragon Ball Z Universe. In a world filled with extraordinarily powerful androids, nearly imperishable mystic beings and interplanetary space fighters, there are only a select group of mixed martial arts warriors who now can occupy the space between both the Dragon Ball Z and MMA planes of existences.
Make a wish and gaze upon MiddleEasy.com’s Top Ten MMA fighters That Secretly Occupy The Dragon Ball Z Universe.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdQLaHEpx9w
One of the true MMA architects, Royce Gracie could be no other person in the Dragonball Z world than Master Roshi. Roshi trained most of the Z warriors at one point and even taught Goku the Kamehameha. In the same way, Gracie had his hand in the evolution of all mixed martial artists.
The old, island man possessed a power that greatly increased his strength, physique and even made him look younger. Royce Gracie used this same technique before he fought Sakuraba the second time, but he was popped for a Senzu Bean.
Special Technique: Evil Containment Guard, with small but rapid leg kicks to your kidneys
Power Level: 5,000 – 40,000 (during max transform)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NLj_fFrWL9M
Joe Lauzon will never be the biggest, best, strongest or fastest but Joe Lauzon will always have your back in any sort of intergalactic rumble. Lauzon is the most Krillin. Lauzon is the original human bonus machine and has been in the UFC for nearly a decade. Loyalty, grit, and with a 12-8 record inside the Octagon, Krillzon has the ability to take an ass kicking and comeback for another blood drenched battle.
“Of the night bonus” is woven into the lining of his orange gi. Krillzon come over and join the DBZ squad you lovable SOB.
Special Technique: Destructo Bonus Disc, is a razor-sharp disc of Ki that can slice through almost any defense and make any fight Krillzon is in “UFC KO/Fight/Sub Of the Night” bonus worthy
Power Level: 50K-550,000
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfVZhPlAB_k
Part saint, part demon and definitely from another planet; Anderson Silva is Piccolo. Piccolo was always a wise strategist and found the weaknesses of opponents in battle. Just like the green Namek, it was always as if there were two entities inside Silva. Outside the Octagon, Silva was soft-spoken and a man of few words. Once the cage closed? Silva was a cocky savage that destroyed opponents with a wide array of flashy techniques. Not only that, but there are countless MMA fighters that look up to Silva like young Gohan.
Special Technique: Limb Regeneration, is for when you break a leg and need to rapidly grow another one
Power Level: 60,000 – 80,000,000
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSEz4W782E8
Only an asshole in rainbow pants could be a villain worthy enough to fight in two different realms. The sagas of Frieza and Aoki run parallel. Frieza is one of the most vicious villains in the Dragon Ball Z universe while Aoki’s run of “not giving a fuck” actions have made him one of MMA’s best heels.
FrizaOki prefers pants rather than shorts, a ring more than a cage and the destruction of Planet Vegeta over vacation property on Planet Vegeta.
One part ruthless, one part evil with a dash of out this world grappling skills makes Aoki MMA’s Frieza. Kneel before FrizaOki so he can slap a gogoplata on your exposed neck then possible destroy your home planet.
Special Technique: Death Beam, a thin bullet-like blast fired from the middle finger after you break your opponent’s arm
Power Level: 7 Thousand colors of the rainbow-100,000,000,000,000,000,000
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veBdwqJbO60
Just like Android 18, Rose Namajunas is way more than meets the eye. Get it? Transformers, robots, androids? Either way, cobalt-eyed Namajunas and Android 18 are badass chicks who dish out brutality to whoever gets in their way. 18 even embarrassed Vegeta the first time they fought, which is no easy feat. Here in our parallel universe, Rose just submitted WSOF Lightweight champion Justin Gaethje. Maybe Namajunas is actually an android and so is Pat Barry.
Special Technique: Power Falling Star (used to defeat Paige VanZant)
Power Level: 320,000,000
Cell Jones is Dr. Dana Gero White’s greatest creation. Cell Jones and his endless potential for growth make him the perfect fighting machine. Maybe too perfect. Jon Jones in human form is wrecking machine the sport of MMA has never seen before. With every legendary light heavyweight Jones has defeated he has gained their powers to use at his own disposal.
Cell’s immense power makes him almost too big to fail versus your standard Dragon Ball Z characters. Like Jon Jones when Cell fails he fails hard. See UFC 151, UFC 200 and his battle with Teen Gohan. Cell Jones in any reality the only being that can defeat you Cell Jones is you.
Special Technique: Good Will Absorption, the ability to suck the life force out of an opponent through trolling, eye pokes, failing a drug test or hell-bows
Power Level: 220,000,000-2,211,111,111
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waPBAoYKqxE
A ship materialized in a giant, blue orb like the Terminator and out stepped a fighter from the future. The pod door opened, and a spinning shit master was revealed; with Lyoto Machida reflexes and the takedown defense to pull it all off. The future is now and it is Stephen “Wonderboy” Thompson. In Dragonball Z, Trunks traveled back in time to to fix his dangerous, dystopian future, but Wonderboy is just here to kick ass and finally get that UFC Welterweight title. …But how will that change out timeline?
Special Technique: Blazing Karate Blitz Rush, mostly used with spinning strike knock outs or out of nowhere headkick KO’s
Power Level: 100,000 – 800,000,000
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eHm1jusDC9A
Robbie Lawler can take on many forms. Hell, Lawler made his debut way back in 2001 (2001!!!) and the ebbs and flows of his career have been enough to fill the cups of many men. The offshoot Buu form of Magaical Buu Lawler appeared roughly around the year 2014.
Buu Lawler gains and absorbs the powers of his opponent as the battle goes on. When a stand-off reaches the championship rounds, Buu Lawler transforms into nearly an unstoppable whirlwind of violence. Do not mess with fifth round Buu Lawler, and your soul should remain relatively safe inside the confines of your chest cavity.
Special Technique: Fifth Round Death Stare, a thin bullet-like glare fired from his eyes that eats your soul
Power Level: 1,000,000,000-5,555,555,555
There is no fighter that Nick Diaz could be other than Vegeta. You may have a problem with what they say, but you can not deny their intimidating skill. The Diaz Brothers are like Sayians themselves; incredibly durable, gets stronger after a fight and subject themselves to inhuman training. If hyperbolic time chambers existed in real life (and cannabis was legal in competition) then Nick Diaz would have belts in three different weight classes. Where you at, Kakarot?! Where you at, motherfucker?!
Special Technique: Ridiculing you and punching you until you die, an endless armory of middle fingers and Stockton slaps to unleash upon your opponents
Power Level: 500,000 – 2,100,000,000
Goku St-Pierre’s saga begins like many, when he fell to the Quebec, Canada part of the Earth world and was bestowed the gifts to be the most well rounded fighter in UFC history. Even though he is scared of Extra-Terrestrials, GSP’s powers come from a source not of this world. The greatest welterweight in MMA history is beloved the world over including Toronto, Montreal, Ottawa and even as far west as Vancouver.
The Goku St-Pierre timeline includes humbling defeats that only strengthen his resolve. We root for GSP not because he has the potential to the perfect fighter of all universes but because he has almost human-like flaws that make the world swirling around him invested.
GSP is the face that both divides and keeps the worlds of MMA and Dragon Ball Z from overheating and combusting into particles of untethered matter.
Special technique: Canadian Spirit Bomb, a powerful sphere that gathers energy from the beings in the Great White North and concentrates it to form the most well-rounded attack in the multiverse
Power level: 170-1,700,000,000
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*Honorable Middle Easy Z Fighters: Big Ben Rothwell is Nappa, Gohan is Sage Northcutt, Tien is Martin Kampmann Android 16 is Josh Barnett, Broly is Brock Lesnar, Mark Hunt is Mark Hunt.
