After playing Left 4 Dead 2, I realized that if a zombie apocalypse happened tomorrow — we’re all screwed. A Zombie Attack Survival kit is a chainsaw. If you don’t have one of those, you’re going to die. Alternatively, you can steal Anderson Silva’s straight jab and save humanity. Good luck finding him though, he’s probably vacationing somewhere in Brazil after his monumental performance at this month’s UFC 148. It was a moment in history in which people realized that the greatest UFC fighter wears yellow shorts and has an extreme obsession with Burger King.
As things naturally play out in the order of the universe, when you’re on top, forces will aid in eventually bringing you down. Newton called it the gravitational force of the world, but in the MMA industry, we call it ‘potential middleweight contenders for Anderson Silva.’ Yesterday Chris Weidman said that he should be the next to test his luck against the GOAT, now Alan Belcher methodically listed the reasons why he will defeat Anderson Silva. Tomorrow, be sure to look out for my five-paragraph essay on why fighting Anderson Silva is on the bottom of my list of ways in which to get hospitalized.