The Green Power Ranger has challenged Jean-Claude Van Damme to an MMA fight

Put down your box of assorted chocolates and put on your ‘LOL hats’. Wow, you really do have an ‘LOL hat’. I thought those things were just metaphorical. Perhaps you live in a metaphorical universe that only you know about. How’s the weather like out there? How’s the local food? I would like to meet you some day but I failed 7th grade English. Sort of revokes whatever pass I need to get into whatever metaphorical universe you’re living in.

Jason David Frank, better known as ‘The Green Power Ranger’ (and sometimes The White Ranger based on some Hollywood technicality) has had beef with Jean-Claude Van Damme since 1995. Lets take a stroll down Memory Lane and let’s try not to merge over into Hangover Highway (because it sucks, trust me). In 1995, the Dow Jones closed above 5,000 for the first time (Bill Clinton ftw), the Oklahoma City bombings went down, The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame opened up in Cleveland, the first Playstation was released in North America and 1995 was the same year Jean-Claude Van Damme refused to attend the premier of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie. The Green Power Ranger has held this grudge for 15 years and over the weekend, he’s challenged the Universal Soldier to an MMA match. Here’s what Jason David Frank had to say about his recently issued challenge:

“Anytime, anyplace, anywhere” — and “if [Van Damme’s] too scared to come into the Octagon, I’ll even take him on in a kickboxing match.”

If your ‘LOL hat’ hasn’t flown off your head and into the atmosphere, the you probably forgot to push the ‘On’ button when you put it on. Just messing around, I have no idea what the science is behind one of those ‘LOL hats’. I’ve never seen one but I assume they’re phallic shaped and have annoying blinking LED lights at the top. Regardless of your headgear, The Green Power Ranger has called out Jean-Claude Van Damme and that morsel of news should make your Valentines Day just a little bit better. [Source]

Published on February 15, 2010 at 12:23 am
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