Sorry Aoki, no magical submission pants in Tennessee

I wonder how much the doctor’s bill is from all the epileptic seizures caused by looking at Shinya Aoki’s pants. It’s like the dude sent his pants to the Carebear’s Art and Science Institute, got them back and rinsed them in a rainbow. If Crayola and Spandex got drunk one night and hooked up, it’s offspring would be Shinya Aoki’s pants. Not only do Shinya Aoki’s pants look amazing (even if you’re colorblind), but his pants have been accused of…cheating. Just like Venom got his superpowers from the symbiotic alien suit he wears, now Tennessee is accusing Shinya Aoki of gaining an extra advantage by rocking the most colorful spandex earth has ever seen. The Tennessee athletic commission has laid the hammer on Shinya Aoki’s spats and he will not be allowed to wear them at Strikeforce Nashville. Here’s what MMAfighting.com managed to squeeze out of Jeffrey Mullen, the director of the Tennessee Athletic Commission.

“We’ve researched the matter and determined that if he wears spandex it needs to stop above the knee. The way the unified rules read is it can be MMA shorts, kickboxing shorts or bike shorts, and it’s my understanding that if it stops above the knee it would be considered bike shorts. He won’t be able to wear the pants, but he will be able to wear that material, as long as it stops above the knee.”

Last summer, Shinya Aoki defended wearing his pants like any proud mother would defend the honor of their first born. In an interview with MMAFanhouse, Aoki stated:

“It is nothing to do with my grappling skills. Anybody who has experience of grappling should know about this. This question seems for non-professional.”

We thought he was talking about the fact that his opponent may spaz out from an epileptic seizure and not with the extra traction his pants provide him. I’m not sure if those pants do provide him an advantage for the sole fact that I’ve never worn neon colored pants and tried to submit someone. Regardless, as long as Aoki enters the ring with this music and rocks his elaborate collection of spandex we will continue to watch him in awe as he makes the color spectrum proud. [Source]

Published on March 4, 2010 at 1:17 am
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