It has been an unbearably slow news week in the world of MMA. It’s as though finally getting the Diaz vs St. Pierre fight over with was one massive orgasmic combat climax and everyone has now rolled over closed their eyes and fallen into a deep sleep recovery nap. The only thing saving this week from being a total snoozefest is tonight’s Bellator card. Thankfully, we can all begin watching the prelim fights for that on Bellator.com starting at 730pm EST. Until then, there’s just not much out there as far as media coverage is concerned.
Lucky for all of us, someone over on MMA.tv dug up this 4-week-old gem of a story posted on Fightland.com about Julie Kedzie as told by Julie Kedzie. In case you’ve some suffered memory loss due to being struck in the skull by a small flying boulder recently, Kedzie is the fighter we all went crazy for when she put on a warrior’s fight with Miesha Tate in August of 2012. She is now signed in the Women’s divison of the UFC and has been fighting in the sport all over the world for many years. Those years have given her some crazy entertaining stories to tell that are perfect for a day like today. No-we don’t have any fighter smack talk or no dramatic injuries to report on instead we’ve got a story about Kedzie in Russia with poop in her pants and a flirty Italian Prime Minister. That actually sounds much better than the usual fight game hype stuff anyway.
When I fought in BoDog once, there were only the other fighters and their coaches there; there was no one else in the crowd. So thinking about fighting in front of a huge UFC crowd sounds crazy to me. Then again, there was the time I fought in BoDog for a huge crowd and Vladimir Putin was there.
This was the second time I was going to St. Petersburg to fight and it was the first time I was working with Greg Jackson. I’d been training with him for about three weeks, and I really wanted to impress him. We go to Russia. I fought Julia Berezikova, who’s the Russian girl in Russia, so you kind of expect there’s going to be some favoritism — Russian judges, in Russia, at a Russian fight.
Anyway, she breaks my nose in the first round of the fight, but I ended up winning the first round by taking her down. I go back to my corner and Greg is fixing my nose and making sure I’m not bleeding everywhere. And Amanda Buckner, who was the second in my corner, put cold water on the back of my neck. I’d had a lot of fights but I’d never had anyone put cold water on the back of my neck, and it kind of shocked me. And when she did I jumped and I thought I’d farted.
So I go back out there and I win the fight. Then after the fight they rush me onto a bus and I’m still in my gloves, I still have this bloody nose, and it’s insane – I’m still in my fight clothes, and they rush me onto this bus and they ferry us to this high tea at a palace with Vladimir Putin and Silvio Berlosconi. Jean-Claude Van Damme is there, Fedor Emelianenko. Fedor’s my favorite fighter! And I’m ripping my gloves off and I’m like, “God, I smell really bad. What is that smell?” So I run into the bathroom and I realized that I had shit my pants during the fight! I’m meeting Vladimir Putin! I’m with dignitaries, and there’s silk damask and gold everywhere, and I’m sitting there in soiled pants! It’s insane. And there’s no trash cans. So I take my underwear off and I roll it up and I shove it in the corner of the bathroom and then I clean myself up as best as I can, and then I go out there and I’m taking pictures with Berlusconi and Putin, and there are armed guards and everything like that. It was insane! So my memory of fighting in front of dignitaries in this huge arena is that I had shit in my pants.
And Bersluconi hit on me anyway! He came up to me and was like, “Are you single or are you married?” That was one of the most surreal things of my life: this Italian prime minister hitting on me with poop on my pants.
If you want to read more about Julie Kedzies’ early days in MMA you can do that right now at Fightland.com