Jesus Christ will come back to Earth and work at Starbucks before Ronda Rousey vs. Cris Cyborg goes down at 135 lbs in Strikeforce. The only way you can truly train to face a Frate Trane is to eat toy cars for breakfast and urinate excellence throughout the day. You must then pour this excellence in a glass and drink it, Lyoto Machida style. With enough time, every human byproduct that your body can produce will be instilled with the virtues of the Frate Trane. A glow will begin to emanate from your skin and after getting your head dunked in water by a guy named ‘Sho-Nuff,’ you will gain the ability to catch bullets in your teeth. We’re assuming Ronda Rousey undergoes this on a daily basis, but when she’s not busy perfecting her perfection — she’s throwing verbal digs at Miesha Tate and Bryan Caraway Tate.
Check out what Ronda Rousey said at this weekend’s UFC Q&A when someone asked her to do a kill-marry-armbar between Miesha Tate, Tito Ortiz, and Bryan Tate.