Demetrious Johnson is from Madisonville, Kentucky. I’m not sure why, but for the longest time I had thought that he was from Cynthiana, Kentucky. Maybe someone mistakenly told me that was the case. Maybe during an interview he said “rural Kentucky” and due to the Walking Dead I presumed Cynthiana. Maybe because Spider-Man was on earlier today I was thinking about the deceased Randy “Macho Man” Savage. It’s a bummer that Johnson isn’t from Cynthiana, because the small city is home to one of the greatest beacons of shameless feasting known to man – the KFC/Taco Bell. A place where not only can you get tacos and fried chicken in the same place, but the KFC portion has a friggin’ buffet! Get a couple of tacos, maybe a nacho supreme, and then the buffet and recreate one of the more disgusting scenes from Se7en.
Now, it’s been at least ten years since I’ve been in Cynthiana so I’m not even sure if the KFC/Taco Bell is still there. I’m also not sure, but maybe Madisonville has one as well. Just like Colonel Sanders had a recipe that would eventually forever associate Kentucky with unhealthy, yet delicious dietery habits, Demetrious Johnson had the recipe for victory tonight against John Moraga. The fight was close to over a few times in the first three rounds, almost ending in the first, but each time it seemed like Mighty Mouse was about to seal the deal he was cut off by that infernal airhorn. Johnson wasn’t deterred, and persevered on a level that would make Jamie Jasta proud to earn the latest stoppage in UFC history with an armbar late in the fifth round. Gif?
Thanks to Zprophet for the .gif as always.