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Luke Rockhold palms a tiger’s testicles and doesn’t buy him dinner

Luke Rockhold palms a tiger’s testicles and doesn’t buy him dinner

Luke Rockhold has traveled to the Far East, where he decided to go on the most sexually-themed safari ever. He warmed up by testing his fate with a cobra, nature’s deadliest phallic symbol. Next, he palmed the testicles of a Tiger. He even appears to be scolding the animal. No telling what it did wrong, but it had better shape up. Because if Luke has done any grip work in a gi, Mufasa is going to become Queen of the Jungle.

According to Luke, he was just joking around.

But the Tiger isn’t laughing, and I doubt he has Twitter. He actually looks pretty indifferent about becoming a living metaphor for grabbing life by the balls. And Luke got to claim dominance over God’s creation without shooting anything with a high-powered rifle.

Is it creepy? Perhaps. Is it funny? Doubtful. But you can’t really hold Luke accountable. Because with a name like Rockhold, every so often, he just has to hold some rocks.

 

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