When I was in 10th grade, I owned Xpired.net which was essentially a hub where all the little high school phreakers/hackers would download plans to build impossible-to-construct electromagnetic surveillance devices and other machines that would ensure you would never lose your virginity. There was a thing called ‘HERF’ which a few claimed could be assembled with parts from Radio Shack and housed in the enclosure of a standard backpack. When the device was turned on, you could allegedly aim the antenna at another electric device and disrupt the machine’s circuitry. In short, if Homeland Security existed back in those days, I would have finished the remainder of my high school education in Guantanamo Bay. You don’t attract chicks by coding HTML on a Friday night when you should be illegally drinking in someone’s backyard. Not at all. You score the opposite (or same depending, on how you swing) sex by beasting on your high school varsity wrestling team — while looking like a geek doing it.
Hendricks wasn’t always that alpha-male cave man that we’ve all come to know and love. Check out this exclusive year book picture of Hendricks in the 10th grade and notice that he looks exactly like Screech’s doppelganger.
