Jacare vs. Villasenor set for Strikeforce Heavy Artillery

Villasenor is on tap. Any guy that has ‘senor’ in his name you pretty much have to call him sir. In that case, any guy that has ‘Jacare’ in his name, you pretty much have to tap him on his shoulder and say ‘Wtf is a Jacare?’. Jacare is Portuguese for ‘Superhuman Brazilian submission artist’ but for some reason, Wikipedia tells us it means ‘Alligator’. We think it’s lying, even Shane Carwin warned us about user-generated content. Apparently Wikipedia hasn’t seen the ten limbs Jacare collected out of his eleven MMA victories. Dude is like the repo man of arms, elbows and other body parts you only use if you’re a fighter. If you see Jacare crossing the street towards you, be sure to hide your arms in your shirt like you used to do when you were a kid (and then your mom yelled at you because she thought you were making fun of armless people).

This evening, Strikeforce press released that Jacare vs. Joey Villasenor will be on tap for Strikeforce Heavy Artillery in St. Louis on May 15th. Kevin Randleman will also bang against undefeated Roger Gracie at light heavyweight. What’s that you said? Jacare and Joey Villasenor are only middleweights, why are they calling it ‘Heavy Artillery’? Because friggin Brett Rogers will collide with Alistair Ubereem for the Strikeforce Heavyweight belt. If that isn’t enough to hide in a bunker on May 15th, Andrei Arlovski will also bang against Bigfoot Silva in a fight that will blow everyone’s mind if it goes past the first round and it’s all going to air for free on Showtime. Premium cable package ftw.

Published on April 23, 2010 at 1:53 am
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