The only thing that can tear me away from leveling my cooking skill in Guild Wars 2 as efficiently as possible is the announcement that Tim Boetsch will be engaged in fisticuffs amongst other things with Chris Weidman at UFC 155. I picture Dana drinking spring water with gold flakes being all like ‘You think we have weak cards?’ and everyone’s all like ‘Lately, yeah.’ and then Dana flips over the desk he’s behind (not necessarily his) and takes a remote control out of his expensive suit pocket and says: ‘Watch this mother******!’ and turns on the impressive series of monitors behind him to reveal the impressively solid UFC 155 main card.
• Junior Dos Santos Vs. Cain Velasquez
• Middleweight bout: Chris Weidman Vs. Tim Boetsch
• Light Heavyweight bout: Chael Sonnen Vs. Forrest Griffin
• Lightweight bout: Gray Maynard Vs. Joe Lauzon
• Heavyweight bout: Matt Mitrione Vs. Phil De Fries
There’s a whole bunch of storylines, title shots and next-in-lines right there. Well done, Joe Silva. Internet bro-fist for you.