This morning I woke up on my sofa buried in empty Taco Bell bags. My TV was still blasting from last night so I looked up and saw Kristin Kreuk from Smallville in black spandex with blood running down her mouth. From that moment on, I knew today was going to be a good day. Today is finally today. Today is the best today that today could ever be. I can’t believe I’m going to watch Rousey and Kaufman — in just two days. Technically, Saturday will be the absolute day, but today is great too. Ice Cube taught me what the components of a good day are, and judging by the fact that I didn’t have to use my AK this morning, this Thursday is getting off to a phenomenal start.
We’re assuming every day is a great day for GSP since he rocks the UFC welterweight strap like Bill Compton from True Blood rocks a suitcase filled with ulterior motives. It’s also great when you can use hyper-advanced Minority Report technology to attempt to beat your opponent with a full house in poker. I’m sure Tom Cruise would be proud. Wait, you’re telling me this is all CGI and GSP is not doing anything but moving his hands in the air like a maniac? Damn, well I’m simply not impressed by his per-form-mance. Props to Michael Jordan for the find.