Forrest Griffin says that if he loses to Tito Ortiz, he’s going to ‘retire from life’

I spent the weekend feeding an obsessive-compulsive disorder by watching all four seasons of Sons of Anarchy. Lots of characters in that show ‘retire from life’ in every episode. Must be a Nor Cal thing. So Cal always seemed a lot more passive to me. The further South you go, the less likely you are to ‘retire from life.’ Learning how to play the banjo and fishing with your kids is far more important than contemplating a mortal exit strategy. Unfortunately, Forrest Griffin might be looking to change all that after his fight with Tito Ortiz. If he loses, he might stop fighting, making you laugh in apocalypse-survival books, and living altogether…

I’ve got people asking me, they say, ‘Forrest, it’s Tito’s retirement fight. If you lose to Tito, are you going to retire?’ If I lose to Tito, I’m going to retire from life…seriously.

Retiring is the new black. Everyone is doing it. Forrest is taking it a step further and making “retiring from life” the new missionary. We hope he wins his fight because we still need him to write an instructional manual on ‘how to properly secure an employment opportunity with the UFC and never get fired.’ It’s a recession and that kind of information would be useful for the remaining few that still have jobs. [Source]

Published on June 13, 2012 at 6:29 pm
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