Dominick Cruz’s footwork is impetuous, impregnable, ferocious and it wants to eat your children

Pretty soon, Harvard scientists will invent a way to harness the power of Dominick Cruz’s feet and will discover the kinetic energy exerted will be enough to power thousands of mid-sized sedans across America. These scientists will then get a few investors on board and use social media to further promote their discovery, which has the ability to reduce carbon emissions by a significant percent. Multi-national oil companies will get word of this upstart company and will first offer to purchase them out for an exorbitant amount of money. They will deny these executives with the knowledge that if they did sell-out, their discovery would never come to fruition. As the company flourishes, a report will emerge that the founder of the alternative energy company fueled by the power of Dominick Cruz’s footwork ‘contracted’ an ultra-rare form of brain cancer. Days after his death, other scientists involved in the project will ‘accidentally’ meet their demise and pretty soon the once promising new technology spawned from Dominick Cruz will be a thing of scientific past. However, before all that goes down, check out this video of Dominick Cruz’s footwork in this time-lapsed video. [Source]

Published on April 14, 2011 at 6:54 pm
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