As our beloved sport of MMA grows, so does the pedigree of athletes joining the ranks of kids who fight for fun. Fighting is all they know, (and I’m just trying to make cash without stripping) but there are also college athletes, the guys whose lives have been surrounded by athletics and glory and chicks, worst yet they’re actually good at this athlete thing. With this influx of new blood, the levels of douchebags are bound to multiply, but so do the levels of purebred bad mutha (shut yo mouth) athletes. Football players, though viewed as big dumb animals (especially college ones) only deepen the the murky swimming pool waters of our sport even more.
Exhibit A: Jake Huen. Let’s ask him some questions.
What would your mutant power be? I don’t need a super power. I am all that is man. I would take these big ‘ol fists a mine and beat Superman’s ass to death with ’em. BatMan? Hes just some rich hipster who needs an ass kickin. If that movie was real Bane would have eaten his lunch.
What would a date between you and Ronda Rousey go like? Haha, Rhonda would whoop my ass. Over and over and over again. Hey one can dream right? I envision us ending up back at my place and me wearing a saddle covered in bacon grease.
If you could fight anyone living or dead who? I would love to beat the breaks off Joseph Smith. Yeah I live in Utah now, people are weird.
If you where to fighting tag team fight who would your partner be? Who would you fight? If I Had an ideal tag team it would be me and Don Frye against Bob Sapp and Hong Man Choi. We would inevitably kill those big ‘ol Giants, while bringing glory to USA with our flag print Vale Tudos.
Who wins in a fight: Don Frye’s mustache? Ian McCall Gangs of New York ‘stache? or Roy Nelson’s mullet beard combo? This question is ridiculous. Its clearly Don Frye.
What has been the most disgusting or funny thing to happen to you in a Fight? Listening to a guys arm pop in an Americana while his coach was yelling it wasn’t a submission.(I was mounted) Strength beats good JiuJitz some times.
Favorite fight in MMA, kickboxing or boxing? Rocky IV doesn’t count. It’s a toss up, Don Frye/Takayama, or Cro Cop/Hoost in K1
What was the transition from college football to MMA like? The transition was seamless honestly. I never thought twice about it. I always wanted to punch people in the face for money. People don’t understand that mindset, and I don’t understand there lack of understanding. But hey, everything isn’t for everybody.
Feelings on Forrest Griffin theory of “the more video games you play, the better at grappling you come.” I don’t play video games. Life is crazy enough…
What comic book character best reps your fighting style? Who was the baddest bad guy in the comics? Apocalypse? Whoever ends dreams.
What do you think a fight with Nick Diaz and Jesus would go like? Aren’t they the same guy?
What appears more homosexual? Rubbing abolean on another man in the sauna? Or staring at a naked man on a scale? Both in my case, I tend to be naked when doing either.
Why should we watch you fight? Because unlike most guys these days, I am really about putting on show and taking fights that will be exciting. I don’t do this because it’s the cool thing to do, I do this because deep down in my being I have a drive to compete at the purest level of competition, and for my money that is fighting another man, one on one.
What do you think a tougher fight would be? Herpes or aids? Aids man. Who doesn’t have herpes these days?
A drunken dime piece is into you at the bar and wants to take you home, but she has a huge cold sore and one hand. How do you go about it? Don’t think twice. Balls Deep. I am not a Quitter.
Of the fights in your career so far which is most gangster to you? All of them. Every fight I’ve been in has been exciting and fast paced. But if I had to choose it would be against Ed Carpenter. Cro Cop was Jealous.
You could do the maneuver to another person but it has to happen to you first: legal elbows or soccer kicks & knees to the head on the ground? Soccer Kicks!! Holler at me OneFC!
Finish this sentence: I should fight ________ in the UFC because: Anybody in the UFC because I will give the people what they want: A Fucking Scrap.