When the aliens invade at the end of December and the X-com initiative is executed by Earth’s collected governments, the MiddleEasy staff will be put in charge of recruiting. When we are ushered into our underground bunker with neat hologram maps and **** and the meeting begins, vegetable spread in the corner of the room and all, Chris Camozzi will be one of the first humans plucked to join the squad. It’s not easy to walk into Brazil, beat up a guy like Luiz Cane and walk out barely worse for wear after fifteen minutes of fighting, but Camozzi did just that. We don’t want to imply Camozzi was able to gain that much needed edge in his fight because of the powers MiddleEasy.com readers inherently receive from the site, but we are willing to take some credit if Chris wants to admit what everyone else knows: you read MiddleEasy and you gain +5 in whatever stat category of life you choose, and Camozzi chose ass-kicking tonight.
Congratulations on your third win inside the Octagon in a row, Chris Camozzi. Maybe you should be wearing the MiddleEasy monster somewhere on your outfit or your X-com carapace Armor.