Chael Sonnen vs. Lyoto Machida is pretty much a done deal

Despite reports that Lyoto Machida spawned from some dragon egg on top the hills of Salvador, Brazil thirty three years ago, Lyoto does have a dad and his dad does drink his own urine. Urine drinking is nothing new people, it’s been a steady medicinal practice for over a thousand years. I tried it out because my friends bet me five dollars, a bottle of Powerade and a gift card to Barnes and Nobles that I later found out was expired. Drinking a glass of urine is the new black. It goes with everything. You’re telling me you’ve never had a urine/vodka before? It’s great, try it. Next time you’re at a bar ask for a ‘Pee Bomber’, they’ll know exactly what you’re talking about. If they do know what you’re talking about, then it’s obvious they’re just disgusting people. Get out of that bar as soon as possible.

According to sources close to Fighters Only Magazine, it appears that Chael Sonnen vs. Lyoto Machida is essentially a done deal and the light heavyweight bout is slated for UFC 136 in Houston, TX. Kenny Florian and Jose Aldo are likely to headline the event.

We’re hoping Chael Sonnen incorporates urine in his extraneous pre-fight discussion, since it is pre-fight discussion and not ‘smack talk.’ Chael doesn’t even know what that word means, nor does he care. Chael Sonnen was seconds away from being the UFC middleweight champion and was caught in a hail mary submission from a Brazilian. The guy has spent eleven months thinking about that one moment, eleven months of training, improving his game, touching up his BJJ with the Diaz brothers and sharpening his boxing with actual boxers. Look at that banner picture, a glaring visage of a man who wants nothing more than to bash the head of another Brazil in order to get his shot at the title. This is what MMA is all about, folks. [Source]

Published on July 5, 2011 at 2:28 pm
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