My doctor told me that if I didn’t stop taking ecstasy, I would have a life-long bout with epilepsy. Just kidding, I’ve never consulted a doctor about my MDMA use in the past. Of course, just kidding about the MDMA use part — besides why would I admit that I’ve taken ecstasy, consumed copious amounts of water, ripped off my shirt, and danced until 8am every Saturday to a bunch of strangers I’ve never met on the internet? Besides, my mom could be reading this — and she’s still under the impression that I’ve never ingested a beer in my entire life.
As long as I’m alive I’ll continue to maintain the illusion that I’ve never consumed any substance adverse to my health. Aside from the microwavable TV dinners I used to scarf down when I was a kid, that statement is mostly truish.
The point I’m trying to make is in order not to poke fun at epilepsy, we’re skirting around the issue so that we won’t offend anyone out there. Now it’s the time in the article when we show you a video of a guy having an epileptic seizure after getting cleanly knocked out in this edition of Blast to the Past. Check out what happened back in 2009 at NFC 2 Night of the Titans when Vince Rennels took on Zac Sheggrud.