My old English professor told me articles don’t write themselves, which is unfortunate because that could save me a lot of time during the day. However since Chael Sonnen is fighting this weekend at the debut of UFC on FOX Sports 1, and Mayhem Miller was arrested for being Mayhem Miller, this edition of Blast to the Past is rather topical.
Still, I have to write this article since the words can’t give birth to themselves. I can pretend like we’re not exploiting both athletes by rehashing a fight that you never knew existed, or I can pretend that I was a purple chimera that had the power to shoot lasers from my eyes. I can pretend a lot of things, actually. We can pretend like you won’t read every word of this article, but you will. Not really sure why, actually. I mean technically the article should have stopped and you should be looking at a video of Chael Sonnen taking on Jason Miller at HFP 1: Rumble on The Reservation on March 30th 2002. However you’re not. You’ve opted to read words instead of leisurely recline in your office chair. Well then I’m just going to keep hammering at this keyboard until I find enough words to divert your attention to this video. Alright, look at this mush mouth from the Conservative News Media repeatedly say ‘Kale Sonnen’ as he flips out at Silva’s submission of Sonnen shortly after UFC 117.
Ok, that’s enough. On to the video. To the MMA hipsters that will respond to this article with ‘Oh, I knew this fight happened’ — have fun rocking your skinny jeans.