No longer can I preface an article about Fedor Emelianenko with a ‘robot from the future’ reference coupled with some statement that links Fedor’s overhand right with some obscure section of quantum physics. Great, that makes my job a lot easier. Now I can stop going to the library to check out books about the Niels Bohr’s atomic theory. Just kidding, no one goes to libraries anymore. They’re about as antiquated as these ‘book’ things we’ve been hearing less about in 2011. Pretty soon society will forget how to turn pages and our index finger will eventually deteriorate, forcing humans to evolve into some freakish, four-fingered creature that relies on AC adapters, Wi-Fi and overpriced subscriptions to Amazon.com. It doesn’t look good for us, and we all know who’s to blame. Damn you Apple, there would be an influx of finger pointing, but pretty soon we won’t have any.
Before all of that happens, check out the last remaining form of print media that truly matters: Japanese MMA magazines. Both Kamipro and Gong Magazine have made one of the most disturbing pictures in MMA the cover of their magazine. Needless to say, seeing Fedor on the cover of anything with the words ‘The Long Goodbye’ is somewhat disturbing.