I wonder how much the doctor’s bill is from all the epileptic seizures caused by looking at Shinya Aoki’s pants. It’s like the dude sent his pants to the Carebear’s Art and Science Institute, got them back and rinsed them in a rainbow. If Crayola and Spandex got drunk one night and hooked up, it’s offspring would be Shinya Aoki’s pants. Not only do Shinya Aoki’s pants look amazing (even if you’re colorblind) this morning, but they scored the victory over Joachim Hansen to grab the Dream Lightweight Belt.
Shinya Aoki wasn’t available for comment after the fight but we did get an interview with his Magical Submission Pants which ended in all reporters convulsing on the ground in an epileptic seizure. Scientists could harness the color from Shinya Aoki’s pants and use it to power a second sun (just in case Fedor accidentally overhand rights the first one out of the solar system). If Shinya Aoki’s pants could talk, they would speak in ‘ROYGBIV‘. Congrats goes to the Baka Survivor on his victory. Now can we get a little Kawajiri vs. Aoki?