My apartment is infested with little mutant insects that are too cute to kill. At least, I like to think of them as miniature mutants. Otherwise, my place is just infested with bugs -- and that reality is unacceptable. I need to mentally weave a story that will make me comfortable with my living situation. The current illusion that I've been telling myself is a can of mutagen spilled underneath my sink and a mother insect laid eggs in the ooze, giving birth to a race of very tiny insects that will telepathically communicate to warn me of an earthquake before it happens. Currently, these psychic bugs have an extreme fascination with my box of Raisin Bran. It's cool, they can have some as long as they actively play a part in saving my life in the wake of a cataclysmic natural disaster.

Brock Lesnar doesn't have this problem. I'm sure the average man is considered an insect to this guy. If your name doesn't begin with 'Divertic', then you have no hope of stopping the original frate trane. Yes, that's spelled correctly.

Lesnar has a new book out called 'Death Clutch' and he really wants you to read it. So much in fact that you can go through the first fifty pages of the book for absolutely free. Harper Collins Canada has enabled readers to crack open the hardcover edition of his book just by clicking here. You can also click here and read it. Both of those links go to the same page, so enjoy your illusion of choice. [Source]

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+16 # synthsis 2011-05-19 19:53

no thanks.

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0 # judoka 2011-05-19 20:08

awww shit, beat me word for word

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0 # Lefthea D. Kick 2011-05-19 21:06

same hahaha

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0 # Guest 2011-05-19 20:25

Me too

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0 # Guest 2011-05-19 21:21

Thanks for the link, I just finished reading. Although its not the first 50 pages that are free but the first 5-6 pages of each chapter.

Good book for Lesnar fans.

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+2 # Guest 2011-05-19 21:41

-"Parts of the book will make you turn, cower and run, just like Lesnar himself!"

-"Shocking...I was doing cartwheels!"

-This book will push you. You'll be gassed 3 minutes into the first chapter!"

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+2 # Guest 2011-05-19 22:02

I was "gassed 3 minutes into the first chapter"

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0 # Guest 2011-05-19 21:45

Deathclutch. What does that even fucking mean?! Lmao

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+3 # jawesome 2011-05-19 22:27

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0 # Guest 2011-05-20 08:04

The cartoon version of Lesnar's chest tattoo is better than the actual one.

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0 # jabjunkie 2011-05-20 18:06

I tried I really did. I don't foresee brock becoming a laureate writer any time soon..

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