Whatever chance humanity had of defeating Fedor has been eliminated the first day Fedor picked up an AK-47. Fedor Emelianenko with guns is a little redundant. What can bullets do that Fedor hasn't already done with an overhand right? The worst a bullet can do is maybe end a life, Fedor has the ability to end worlds. An overhand right with enough force to puncture a hole through space and time leaving a black hole in the shape of a fist.

Fedor Emelianenko's first film, The Salamander Key (previously known as The Fifth Execution) premiered in Moscow a few days ago, which most likely means that it will be on limited release in the US sometime this summer. Fedor Emelianenko's character in the film just goes by 'Fedor' which should be enough to condense this feature film's length down to the time it takes you to say 'Fedor'. Regardless of what third world country you're in, uttering 'Fedor' is really all you need to silence any guerrilla rebellion.

Movie is over, done. Anything else that takes place is just unnecessary.

Emelianenko also inked another deal, a film entitled 'Karate' that was scheduled to be produced this year, but the project has apparently been abandoned. In the film, Fedor was slated to star alongside Andrei Arlovski and your boy, Jean-Claude Van Damme. Sometimes you forget Jean-Claude Van Damme even exists (sort of like New Hampshire). Here's an idea for a Jean-Claude movie, make a film called 'Fedor' which would consists of Fedor Emelianenko just fighting mythological creatures like chimeras and minotaurs to see how long they would last in the cage with him. We don't need a plot, we already have one: A Russian dude beating up stuff. It worked for Rocky IV.

Check out every Fedor Emelianenko action scene and backstage footage from 'The Salamander Key', right here.

Comments   

 

+2 # hornswoggle 2011-03-28 12:43

Animals were harmed in this film

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+4 # aint.that.a.kick.in.the.head 2011-03-28 12:53

I like salamanders

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0 # Guest 2011-03-28 12:44

this film isnt on michael madsen's imdb?

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0 # Guest 2011-03-28 12:51

at 2:24 it sounds like he breaks the guys neck when he punches him haha!

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+1 # Guest 2011-03-28 13:39

Video of Fedor in training in Holland

that Vinny Magalhaes? I woulda preferred someone heavier but its > Sidelikov/Zentsov.

http://www.mixfight.ru/multimedia/video/category/trainings/2011/3/fedor_training_muai_tai_in_Holland/

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0 # Guest 2011-03-28 14:02

watched it... its pretty short and apparently Vinny M's not seen on camera

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0 # Cheebo 2011-03-28 15:47

Fedor at 6:39 = lulzorzz

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0 # Lefthea D. Kick 2011-03-28 19:20

Too bad Michael Madsen looks like a tool in this movie and not Reservoir Dogs/Kill Bill awesome. Also disappointed by the lack of sambo leg locks.

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0 # Guest 2011-03-29 01:07

Fedor using a bazooka is like Wolverine obtaining Cyclops' optic blast.

All that power combined could destroy the entire planet.

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-5 # Guest 2011-03-29 04:08

I really hoped we'd seen the last of the Fedor hyperbole! But obviously it is still alive and well on MiddleEasy on a regular basis. Fedor has been exposed as an overrated fighter. Submitted and battered, his lack of development has been well and truly exposed. Please drop the ridiculous similes and metaphors - they are redundant in light of his last two crushing defeats.

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+5 # Guest 2011-03-29 08:07

stfu and have some respect before fedor makes a hyperbole out of your spine.

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-1 # Guest 2011-03-30 02:57

Seriously - GET. OVER. FEDOR. I don't mind respect for him, but this outright disillusion when it comes to his greatness is beyond a joke. He has finally been exposed - please realise this.

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-1 # Guest 2011-03-29 12:41

and i thought steven seagal was a bad actor...oh shit, better watch out for sparta kick to the face for the rest of my life...

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