The 3rd Annual MiddleEasy Comment Awards

Jason Nawara

Feb 01 |10:28

The auditorium doors open and hordes of MiddleEasy fans, Comment Award nominees, past winners, and various A-list celebrities file impatiently into the lobby to grab snacks for the show. The crowd that has shown up is huge. The lines of humans, mutants and trolls are out the doors and wrap around the building all the way down the street for about 3 city blocks. No one expected this. So many people have shown up. Bottlenecks are created at the security check-in and clearly, if something isn't done soon, people are going to get trampled to a living-death, or even a death-death. The MiddleEasy crew is in the green room, wondering how to take care of the overcrowding at the entrance of the building. They all look to each other; Bauzen shrugs and takes a bite out of a taco he found in his pocket. Cat is too busy kicking the heavy bag with her one-of-a-kind knee sock shin guards. This is how she prepares for the award show, and she will not be bothered. Jason is attempting to organize a prizefighting league in MineCraft and Layzie is already intently focused on providing the smoke and pyrotechnics for the show.

A speaker in the corner of the room by the ceiling comes to life, it's Zeus. 'It's cool,' he says 'I'm going to put Roy out there for now.' Roy? Cat stops kicking, Bauzen looks up but continues chewing, Jason pauses the game and Layzie starts browsing YouTube. Glances are exchanged, then knowing nods come from the collected heads in the room.

Outside the auditorium, Roy Nelson appears atop the marquee, and in one fell swoop takes off his shirt, rubs his belly and shouts to the heavens: 'The MiddleEasy Comment Award Show 3 is over capacity!' 'Please be patient and we will get all of you inside eventually.' The crowd grows entranced by the moon-belly and quickly falls into more organized lines. A small construction crew then shows up to install another entrance and widen the current doorways.

Finally, after a sluggish entrance, the seats are filled to capacity and then some. Synthsis is still front row, but there's so many people in the room that attendees are spilling over into the aisles and he's found himself with Ted Malakhov joyfully sitting in his lap. Aint.That.A.Kick.In.The.Head is off to the side, doing an interview discussing his past performance as a Comment of the Year winner. Chiggs, Motivated Penn, Gansu, Fat Pikachu are arguing with SST about something in the bathroom, and a general 'buzz' is in the air. This is it, the award season's final golden moment. Steve McAwesome pumps his fist and high-fives Lefthea D. Kick and SnakeJake. Finally, the lifeblood of MiddleEasy will be recognized for their genius and general funny comments.

The curtains raise.

If you don't don an Italian accent then exclaim 'Ya mutha's a Rua!' every time Shogun makes his walk to the Octagon, you are dead inside. We love puns here at MiddleEasy, so much so that we are giving an award away for the best one this year, and it involves Shogun Rua and a thrilling adventure through the sky. We hope you guys get it. ILostMyYoshi, here's your award and a handshake. Keep your acceptance speech at thirty seconds or we're going to blast the exit music (Wu-Tang).

"I have a feeling that even if Shogun's chute didn't open, he'd still beat Vera."
From: Watch Shogun Rua hit terminal velocity and feel completely alive

Finding out your favorite movie has a plot-hole the size Erik Koch's cut is kind of like finding out there's no Santa. It's like, The Matrix: the computers chose 1999 to simulate the dreamworld so the brains of the humans wouldn't reject what was around them, but why not just simulate the middle ages or some time when humans didn't have the technology to fight back? Fatty_Sam86 brought up one of these gutting moments in an award-winning comment that leaves you wondering why The Avengers want to make everything so hard for themselves.

"So, when Thor, Cpt. America, and Iron Man are fighting in the Avengers and Thor strikes Iron Man with lighting and inadvertently super-charges Iron Man's suit... WHY DIDN'T THEY DO THAT AGAIN when they were fighting Loki's army!?"
From: Dude gets caught in a triangle, escapes by knocking out his opponent with Thor-like ground and pound

Rory MacDonald is a fashionable Bond villain in the making, we know this, and fashion in the MMA scene is something surprisingly dissected to the tiniest detail. In our eyes, we'd rather see Rory MacDonald with half of a GQ magazine in his closet than skull and glitter T-shirt piles in his room, but some of the fans out there aren't as accepting of his swanky lifestyle. There are moments, however, when Rory does deserve an eyebrow raise over his selected attire. We think absolutemonster hit this observation on the head, thus he gets an award.

"In Askren's defense, in the pic above, Macdonald IS dressed like Inspector Gadget."
From: Ben Askren scoffs at Rory MacDonald's fashion sense

The MiddleEasy crew hasn't really played Pokemon, but we all know who Pikachu is, and we never thought we would spend even a second considering the body mass index (BMI) of this fictional character who wields lightning like the gods, but now we have. Since this reader's name had such an effect on us, he or she wins an award. Much like the real Pikachu, the sex is ambiguous

The 'real' OB is someone who has been mentioned in articles since the beginning of MiddleEasy. He's the virtuous, red-headed ex-roommate of multiple authors on the site and is an admitted sports-addict who will share his vast knowledge at the drop of a MiddleEasy beanie. There are multiple commenters named 'OB' or some variation of the name, and they all clashed one fateful afternoon during a discussion about Michael Phelps. We give this award to every OB on the site, especially OB. This escalates quickly.

OB: "I dont know how to measure who the "greatest Olympian" is. But if its by total medals and total gold medals its Phelps by far. And its not like he passed a fellow swimmer to get those records. He passed a woman gymnast. So ya, he had a ton of opportunities to win gold. But he came through almost every single time. Pretty damn impressive"

O.B: "You fucking imposter"

B.O: "What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo."
From: Ian McCall isn't impressed by Michael Phelps and can't understand why you people are

Jon Fitch jokes are like making an armpit fart, obnoxious, amateurish and almost always funny. Even though the Fitch jokes have been fairly obvious since mid-2009, they are still capable of of inducing a chuckle with the proper set up. For your well-timed wisecrack, we give you, Yoshinegro Blackiyama the award for The Extremely Obvious But Still Funny Jon Fitch Comment Award.

"question is, did he finish it?"
From: Let Jon Fitch teach you the inner mechanics of a tasty vegan grilled cheese sandwich

We are not above juvenile humor, and we fully acknowledge the fact that this comment peaked at 69 votes up (heh), so we embrace the immaturity of AnthonyN for the sake of a singular award and bring him up on stage to grab this 24 karat gold phallic award in his honor. Thanks, AnthonyN.

"'I'm training for the best BJ' LOL"
From: Rory MacDonald does not appreciate BJ Penn missing conference calls

There have been late night discussions of whether or not we should host a Best Street MMA Comment Award Show, but it would be too difficult to choose any winners. Maybe next year. In 2012, the Best Image Posted Award came from a Street MMA article featuring a man head kicking another gentleman by the river. After the head kick he explained that the others down by the river didn't know him, or what he was capable of doing to them. Sadly, the video of this encounter has been lost forever, so we are only left with this everlasting image with a quote from the violent occasion.

From: A Lesson in Street MMA: The Probability of Getting Head kicked Increases When You're by a River

We don't have much information on Hungarian MMA, but thanks to commenter HerMomisNOTMyMom, we now know the Hungarian method for dealing with obsessive fans who are writing a book about Roger Huerta. For that, we thank you and give you this award. Please come up to the stage.

"I am terrifying of this videos man...whats fucking your problems? In Hungary, we kill these kinds with the fire."
From: Roger Huerta finally responds to his infamous fan and the book she's writing about him

We remember when the majority of hits for MiddleEasy.com came from our friends and family, so to think we are so influential that we could make people root for an allegedly mystical mass murder is kind of cool in a horrible way. It means we've hit the big time. Pretty soon we'll be creating a MiddleEasy brand Kool-Aid with Red Monster flavor that packs a punch like Fedor. While we sip on our juice we'll be ordering mass amounts of Jon Jones themed black Nike sneakers, and all will be well. We want to award commenter MEOW for letting us know that we are inevitably heading down this dark path. Thanks. Come on up.

"Haha everyone swings on ebersoles nuts because middleeasy and ebersole have a good relationship. If middle easy posted articles about kony being rawesome you guys would suck konys dick too. Get your own mind haters. KOS 4 LIFE."
From: Brian Ebersole says Josh Koscheck is not the 'self made UFC star he would like you to believe'

*Leaning over the podium, darkly speaking into the microphone* So many times is there a comment that is the exact punchline and joke that's in the article and it gets, like, sixty thumbs up. Did you not read the article? We get it, sometimes we get a little carried away, but come on. The ultimate example of this disregard for the article body is so grievous it actually has nothing to do with any words at all. Just straight images. Unfortunately, long time reader and commenter Joey Jo Jo couldn't even comprehend the images in the article before posting what he thought was the missing .gifs of Brendan Schaub's post-KO antics. It's cool, Joey. We still love you. We know you've won Topps cards your comments are so good. Here's an award and a hug.

From: Brian Ebersole says Josh Koscheck is not the 'self made UFC star he would like you to believe'

Bob Sapp went an amazing 0-7 in MMA in 2012, and a slightly impressive 1-1 in kickboxing. In the MMA ring, he spent an average of 77 seconds fighting for his life. Never in combat sports history have we seen a fighter go on such an unfathomable skid of beatdowns. We watched with fascination throughout the year, and we think 2010 Comment of the Year winner Aint.That.A.Kick.In.The.Head summed up the entire Bob Sapp 2012 saga in one nifty sentence. Come on up and get your award, you've been here before, you know to take the little stairs up on the left.

"I bet a Bob Sapp brain scan would look like a fucking kaleidoscope"
From: Bob Sapp just fought in Australia and lost in 12 seconds. Here's the video

In early 2012 UFC.com was hacked for a while, and no one can really remember if it mattered or not. The discussion about piracy and fandom remains in the air though, thick, like a fart in a sauna. So we give this 'Guest,' who ironically happens to be anonymous, this award for Getting The Sh*t Real, if you know what we mean. Try to keep your thank you's as 'politics free' as you can, please.

"I don't believe people who use illegal streams are hurting the UFC at all. People who use streams don't do it because they don't want to pay, they do it because they can't afford to buy every PPV and are big fans of the product. You can't say you're losing profits when the people pirating it were never going to pay for it in the first place because of the economy and their financial status. I've streamed quite a few UFC events in my day, and every time i have it's been because I'm dirt poor from paying my bills. I buy at least 2/3 of the UFC's PPV's per year. I am not a criminal, I'm just a big fan who can't afford to shell out 60 bucks for every single PPV. We're in an economic recession, and suing your fans never bodes well for a copyright holder. Ask Metallica how many fans they lost after the Napster shit. I don't know anyone who likes them anymore or respects them.If the UFC is going to do something about it, go after the people providing the streams, don't sue your fans that are only trying to keep up with the sport in times of economic crisis. We are not trying to hurt you, Dana. If you want to combat piracy, lower the price of PPV's to be more accessible. I don't have to pay for NFL, NHL, and NBA to keep up with those major sports... But if they started charging and it wasn't as ridiculous as a PPV price, I would do it as much as I could to support the athletes and brands I love. We are not criminals, we are fans trying to keep up with a sport we love."
From: The UFC finally issues a statement about UGNazi, the group that hacked UFC.com

It's been almost twenty years since Kurt Cobain was murdered, and still people are quoting his lyrics in MMA comment sections. This reference to one of Kurt's best lyrics from the song Plateau is award worthy for multiple reasons, and all of them will be left up to you in the most enigmatic and cryptic ways possible. You can join in on the discussion of what these lyrics mean if you really want to, but this is an awards show, so let's get to it. Come on up and get your award, Fedor the King. Try not to destroy any of the PA system when you head backstage.

"Nothin on top but a bucket and a mop and an illustrated book about birds!"
From: Stephen Thompson lives up to the hype- look at this head kick right now

With the technology to broadcast yourself from the comfort of your own bedroom resting in nearly every hand in the civilized world, we feel the rapid growth of Vloggers are clogging the bandwidth of the internet backbone like some sort of world wide web version of spinal meningitis - something had to be said. It's bad. Everyone has a Vlog. Everyone. From your little sister to your dead Grandpa. We appreciated this bit of advice from The Butter Knife Murder so much that we decided to create a category for The Solid Advice For The Young and Old Award, and made him the winner.

"WTF? I was watching videos and thinking, "thats why im not gonna give a cam to my daughter." Now im thinking even my granfather wont get one either"
From: Relax folks, this Polish MMA fan just discovered why Bob Sapp keeps losing

Badr Hari will hurt you. This is known. Many hypothetical situations in which Badr Hari could hypothetically hurt you can come about, but this hypothetical situation is so filled with detail and realistic character interactions that we decided it was worthy of an award. Thanks for this one, Sherko. Come on up here, big guy. We're sure Badr Hari is smiling, wherever he is.

"He tweeted a picture of a man who got knocked out in 1 round in their last meeting? Impressive.

I wonder how I would react when my girlfriend cheated with Badr Hari:

Me: "Who is it you whore! I gave you everything and this is how you repay me?"
My GF: "I don't want trouble, just let it go!"
ME: "I WANT A NAAAME!!!" *Breaks shitty vase given by her bitch mother*
My GF: "It's Badr Hari!"
Me: "Ow...... Well.... ehm.... I can't stand in between true love... I hope you'll be happy.""
From: LiverKick | Badr Hari has baby mama drama

The Best Recognition of Responsibility From Lada Gaga's Bodyguard Discussion Award is a new category this year, and we aren't sure if we can expect it next year, so we deliberated in a small room for a while and decided to make it a category for this year, just in case. This Discussion Award is an ensemble award, featuring previous solo category winner Synthsis kicking off a long discussion that ends up coming back around and winning long time reader and commenter Bosswell the Comeback of the Year Award. Watch it unfold below.

synthsis: "Wow, overreact much?"

OneManGOONsquad : "I've seen worse, on both sides."

MixedMonkeyArts: "The guy probably saw movement out of the corner of his eye, some idiot with an object in his hands charging. He did the right thing."

Guest: "I concur. Exterminate with extreme prejudice is what I say. That ballpoint pen and sheet of paper could've been used with deadly effect against that very important pop singer. I blasted a bank teller in the face yesterday that tried to get me to sign something in exactly the same way. Gotta be safe."

Guest: "How is that an overraction at all? obviously that guy slipped through whatever security is outside and rushed her. he apparantely only wants an autograph but he could have a knife, gun, who knows?

he is hired to keep people like that away, and did it with the perfect amount of force. i don't even think he threw a punch... just took the guy down and made sure lady gaga got on her way.

100% justified."

Stullo.de: "Not even a wrestling takedown.. looked more like something Sensei Seagal taught him.

Disgusting in every way..

- Lady Gaga is a terrible musician and an attention whore
- Some security guards enjoy fucking people up a little too much
- That fat fan is a probable virgin/neckbear d PC gaming geek"

bosswell: "'pc gaming geek'

I alt-tabbed out of Portal 2 to check middleeasy"

From: The takedown technique of the week goes to...Lady Gaga's bodyguard

Despite his grammar, deazbush makes an excellent point in this award-winning comment from the late 2012 article: Dana White paid Joe Lauzon $6000 to submit his friend Nick The Tooth in the Octagon. You see, Joe Lauzon had just won a cool six grand by submitting Dana White's friend, Nick The Tooth. Of course, one's mind wonders 'what would I do with a sudden influx of $6K?' We here at MiddleEasy would purchase new TV's with higher refresh rates, because we know the upcoming next generation of consoles are only now bottlenecked by their hard drives (unless they go solid state) and the display.

Commenter deazbush had his own idea of what he would do with six thousand bucks, and it won him an award. Come on up here, buddy. Nice one.

"he can afford to have dinner with rich franklin 6 times, i no thats what i would do"
From: Dana White paid Joe Lauzon $6000 to submit his friend Nick The Tooth in the Octagon

The core demographic of MiddleEasy does not care about handbags. We are sure of this. Of course, we have a fantastic female audience, but honestly, handbags connoisseurs, why must you pitch your wares so frequently in our comment sections? This anonymous peddler of European carry-alls seems to have lost his lucidity as the years have gone by. In the past, this WTF Award winner would give us a solid pitch on why we should by his handbags, now he can barely string a sentence together. Get some help, fren.

"This article is about my interest, I likecheap replica handbags, thank you site workers door to make such a good conte"
From: Gina Carano tells us how she feels about Cyborg being caught using steroids

This is a category that hasn't been broadcast in past years, but has absolutely been in the show before. That's why we go live to tape folks, and you know we're nearing the end of the show when we start talking about previous productions. It is what it is. Commenter sneakAchoke made a startlingly accurate observation about certain demographics that wouldn't be a cliche if it wasn't true to some degree, right? Here's an award, now never say anything like this in a public place again.

"Usually Asians and math teachers get along so well"
From: Drop what you're doing and watch Cung Le place his iron fist on Rich Franklin's chin! Wow!

Kenny, Kenny, Kenny. You came to us in 2012 with an open, bleeding heart. With your long and winding tales of yearning and hopelessness, you were downvoted and reviled. But eventually, your strange and suddenly ambitious heart began to warm us over, and slowly, the MiddleEasy community began to welcome you at the tune of a +2 upvote average for the back half of 2012. Kenny, who goes by KennyNuncaMuere, KennyNuncaMuera, and KennyNeverDies - you are the MiddleEasy commenter of the year out of a strange sense of recognition to the length of your articles and pureness of your soul (we hope).

"I'm new to middleeasy. I wasn't able to post comments from my cellphone after the redesign. I didn't see it on a laptop so I'm not sure exactly how it looked. I mostly post from my cellphone so I probably wouldn't have posted here anymore. I like middleeasy. It's really unrestricted & candid. Some people who comment here are excessively negative but I think it's most likely a reflection of how they feel about their own lives. I like to share my feelings on sites like this because I can't talk about my feelings to people in person. Right now middleeasy feels like my new home. I haven't had a permanent residence in more than a year. I like to feel like a have a fantasy home on the internet but I didn't have that either after leaving sherdog. I don't want to just talk to random people on the net all the time. I like to talk to the same people over & over because it's a chance that I can get to know them and they can get to know me. I know get a little obsessed at times & over the last few months I've been getting obsessed with one particular fighter. But I'm kind of realizing that now & I'm going to try to cool it down."
From: So yeah, that really sucked...

"In the last presidential election I voted for Obama because I'm black. I probably won't vote this election because I don't have a permanent residence & I move a lot for work. I don't know which state I'll be in when the election starts. I've also become disillusioned with politics.

Besides deciding the president, it's still good to vote. You don't have to vote for candidates at all if you don't want too. During most elections they have a bunch of questions or propositions & stuff. But if you don't know what they are & just guess or do it randomly than that's not so good. The news often focus mostly on candidates but don't talk about the propositions you can vote for.

Most people are kind of like sheep - in regards to policies & laws & stuff like that - whether they vote or not. How many people actually care enough about banking policies, industry regulation & random stuff like that to actually put some effort into affecting those policies & stuff? Most people just care about their own lives & what affects them personally.

I'm not sure who Ronda will vote for or if she will vote at all. She follows anonymous on twitter & she's a fan of Joe Rogan's podcast. I've seen things her mom tweeted but I don't know if they see eye to eye on politics. I don't agree with all of Ronda's views on social issues but I like how inquisitive she is. She doesn't just see the face value of things. She looks deeper & tries to understand the mechanics of society & culture. When Ronda was little her older sisters convinced her that she was adopted after she was left on their doorstep by aliens. It helped spark her lifelong interest in conspiracy theories. Ronda has traveled the world & experienced many different cultures. She's lived a vivid life of tragedy & triumph. If you think of the history of kingdoms, nations & nation-states, the royal & noble classes often view themselves as closer to God than the lower classes. The pyramids of egypt was for the pharaoh to ascend into the sky as a God or something like that. Alexander wanted to be worshiped as a God. A lot of powerful people today view themselves as Gods. Most people won't admit it because it would draw contempt from the masses. Ronda is really down to earth & can relate to common people. I think she could potentially be a really important historical figure."
From: If you don't vote, Tim Kennedy will fight you in a Kumite deathmatch

"I'm afraid to do drugs. I'll take pain killers if I need them but other than that I don't do any drugs. Not even cold medicine. Even if you take anti-depressant s it won't cure you. As soon as you stop you'll go back to how you were before or even worse. I'm not saying no one should ever take it but I think far too many people are just medicated without a plan to actually work on fixing what's wrong. I'm guessing I'd probably feel better for a while if I got medicated but I've heard many people say it doesn't last or they don't like the side effects. A lot of antidepressants have increased risk of suicide. I'm already on the edge every so often so why take something that doesn't cure you & increases the chance you'll go off the edge. I really do have any plan to get better but I think I'm doing ok right now. Someone told me you have to stop checking. Like if I close a door & lock it then literally 2 seconds later I wonder if the door is locked & I start to feel anxious.
But even if I really don't care if it's locked or not. I have a hard time letting things go & just relax. Sometimes I don't want to be completely normal but I want to at least be functional. I've missed out on so many experiences because I'm afraid of everything & everyone. But I don't want to lose who I am just to fit in.

Monsanto & other genetically modified food producers are playing hard ball & forcing farmers to use their products & grow their crops. But if the wind blow a few of your neighbors seeds onto your property than they'll sue you for patient violations. They have seed patients. It's crazy how much control just a few companies will have on global food production. Bill Gates is pushing it in developing countries but Warren Buffet's son has a more sustainable approach in my opinion. Search Monsanto on youtube. Remember what Russia did to the Ukraine in the 20 century. Multinational food producing companies can do it on a global scale if the political will was there to do it."
From: If you have anxiety and depression, Jens Pulver can give you a lift

"I'm still taking a break from social media but I just wanted to say that I can't help but imagine what would've happened if he did this against Ronda & the ref was the same guy from the Rousey vs Tate fight.

After he chocked himself out Ronda would've gotten the armbar & ruthlessly twisted his arm in the most grotesque ways possible while he slept & the ref would just watch as if nothing was happening. But Ronda wouldn't stop. She'd just keep twisting until it came off like she did to her Hulk Hogan wrestling buddy.

I'm joking kind of but I really would like to see what Ronda would do to someone's arm while they were unconscious. For some reason this made me think of a band that Ronda was in when she was younger. I've read the lyrics to some of the songs she wrote. Her writing style is kind of similar to Weird Al Yankovic. I want to make a CD with a booklet that has the lyrics & cover art. Then I could give it to her when I meet her at an UFC event or expo or something like that. She probably wouldn't expect that. Maybe I could even get someone to sing the songs with music & everything. That would be crazy. But I'd probably be to afraid to do it. I want to learn how to play the guitar. I don't know if they would let me bring a guitar into a UFC expo though. I bought a guitar a few years ago but haven't learned to play yet. When I bought it the guy who sold it to me asked if I knew were to get some weed. I didn't because I don't smoke weed. I don't even smoke cigarettes.

Ronda is just so amazing. I feel better about life in general when I think about her & when I post stuff about her on the internet. I don't talk about Ronda much to people in real life because I barely talk in real life unless I have to or when I talk to my brother. But I feel kind of embarrassed to talk about Ronda to people in real life. Not because of Ronda but because I like her a lot & I'm a very private person & I'm kind of shy about things like that.

I feel like I'm not as good of a fan of Ronda as I could be. I have a lot of good ideas that I don't follow through on. Sometimes I come across as overzealous in my post which diminishes my persuasiveness. If you think of any popular religion or belief system than you'll notice that it takes more than just a great profit. There needs to be dedicated disciples & committed believers who help spread the message. I won't go into detail but around march of 2012 was a somewhat pivotal time in my life. I was working on a plan to quit my shitty(I mean literally I was exposed to human shit) 9-to-5 job & I became a full time pirate. Going into the fight I was rooting for Miesha because I liked her already & I didn't know who Ronda was. On march 3rd I had no idea how much that night would change my life.

I'm still kind of feel like I'm in a daze or a fog. I need to sort of kill myself & be reborn. That's part of the reason I'm not posting on the internet much right now. I feel like I never really became a man. When I was younger I kind of had gender identity issues although I never expressed it openly. It wasn't in a sexual way. I was always only sexually attracted to females but wasn't sure if I wanted to be a male. But I kind of didn't want to be human either. I have a lot of demons inside that I'm having a hard time getting rid of. I'm afraid to let go because they fill the void. I kind of hate myself. I really don't like what I am. But I don't always feel that way. I'm kind of indecisive about everything."
From: This instructor gets put to sleep employing his 'ultimate armbar defense'

"I was never bullied by one specific person when I was in school. It was kind of evenly dispersed. But no one ever really targeted me to the point where I would think of them as my bully. I didn't talk much in school. Even in high school. I didn't talk much in college either. I still don't talk much except when I have too.A lot of times people think of the negative aspects of bulling but there are some social benefits to positive peer pressure. Culture doesn't just happen by accident in a vacuum. Of course a lot of culture is just coincidental but even then if people went pressured into conforming than society would be chaos. There's a balance. To much or too less can both have consequences. People don't have to be cognitive of the influences that affect their behavior as a group. A lot of it can just happen subconsciously.I think one of my problems is that I miss certain subconscious rhythms that people seem to have that sync together on a subconscious level. Like when I have a casual conversation with someone it can feel the same as a life threatening confrontation so I'm constantly battling different emotions that aren't proportionate to the current social scenario.In an interview Ronda was asked about how she hypes her fights & her answer was really insightful. She's really analytical about how people behave & stuff like that. Like she doesn't just stop at the surface. She tries to understand the reasons behind why people do what they do. She said she wanted fans to personalize her fights like they do in team sports. She gave Boston Celtics vs LA Lakers as an example. Like when someones favorite team beats the favorite team of one of there close friends they feel like they one upped their friend somehow even thought they didn't compete directly. Ronda has used a lot of her observations on fan behavior to market herself with great success. But it goes far beyond just prize fighting. Sometimes I think of her like Neo from the matrix. I feel that a lot of the things she say can help me if I applied it to my own life."
From: According to this guy, UFC's James Head was a massive bully in high school

Finding out your favorite movie has a plot-hole the size Erik Koch's cut is kind of like finding out there's no Santa. It's like, The Matrix: the computers chose 1999 to simulate the dreamworld so the brains of the humans wouldn't reject what was around them, but why not just simulate the middle ages or some time when humans didn't have the technology to fight back? Fatty_Sam86 brought up one of these gutting moments in an award-winning comment that makes you wonder why The Avengers want to make everything so hard for themselves.

Comments

+6 # synthsis 2013-02-01 10:40

A solid list of contenders this year. We saw Ted Malakhov come into his own as the unofficial grammar police of Middle Easy and completely out of left field Mr. KennyNuncamuere . If I didn't know any better I'd think Kenny was the bastard lovechild of Dan Quinn and Multiverse Matt Horwich. Glad I was able get the nod again this year.

The 3rd Annual MiddleEasy Comment Awards

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