Menu

This guy is really, really upset about the Royal Rumble results

This guy is really, really upset about the Royal Rumble results

I didn't watch the Royal Rumble last night. Walsh or Gary should probably be writing this article, but they are either off writing guitar solos or eating steamed cheeseburgers. Maybe both? So now it's on me to provide copy to introduce you to this rather large, bearded 'man' whose wheezing indicates some sort of travesty happened last night at the Royal Rumble. That travesty being Batista returning and winning the Rumble, I think. 

It seems like Batista's MMA training paid off well, for him to just come back and win the Rumble like this...

I just want to know if his gentle whimpers and piggy squeals are indeed real, and not just for the camera.

Last modified onMonday, 27 January 2014 16:29
Jason Nawara

Jason began his writing career with crayons put to construction paper, then he moved on to 8 x 10 cursive ruled paper in grade school, then eventually to the computer, where he now writes every single day for better or worse. Jason enjoys freedom, videogames, and the martial arts. Interested in booking Jason for birthdays or family gatherings? Send him an email.

Twitter: @JasonNawara

Email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Comments   

 
-1 # AuntieRazor 2014-01-27 16:15
That lamp stand must've weighed a ton...getting winded like that after swinging it.
Reply
 
 
-1 # SnakeJake 2014-01-27 17:06
I feel your pain, big man, but remember... the first match with Daniel Bryan and Bray Wyatt was really sweet.
Reply
 
 
+2 # Kentpaul 2014-01-27 17:39
It's still real to me dammit
Reply
 
 
+1 # bayzel22 2014-01-27 18:24
I'll fucking bet anyone that isn't the last WWE PPV he buys and I'll bet he buys the next Royal Rumble. How old is this dude? Looked like he had gray/silver hair.
Reply
 
 
0 # AFrontKicktotheFace 2014-01-27 19:25
Jesus Christ guys. This video is staged. One click on his channel and it's nothing but WWE nonsense. Come on Jason.
Reply
 
 
-1 # Judo Mike 2014-01-27 19:48
I bet he wouldn't be so agitated if his home was more organized. All that clutter can really take a toll on one's mental health.
Reply
 
 
-2 # AuntieRazor 2014-01-28 21:46
...or it's the mental health that created the mess.
Reply
 
 
-1 # SHIN 2 THE CHIN 2014-01-27 21:51
Fuck this ppv im gona have my own royal rumble with my toy set that I got toysrus
Reply
 
 
-1 # Will-Kill 2014-01-28 02:11
Reply
 
 
-1 # Ayatollah 2014-01-28 04:26
Batista is doing wrestling again? Looks like they all go back to it when they can't make it in MMA...

Maybe I'll download royal rumble, it's the only wrestling event I can stand. With so many people in the ring they are making mistakes all the time, very funny.

الله أكبر
Reply
 
 
-3 # jt33 2014-01-28 18:27
hope you saved your time. bray wyatt vs daniel bryan was the only good match. the rumble had one or two decent moments (nash with the nwo music) but thats it.
Reply
 
 
0 # TheDweeze 2014-01-28 06:59
This was like a behind the scenes extra from Hoarders: WWE edition.
I'd bet he has it already on DVD too.
That would be some real Donnie Darko shit.
Reply
 

Add comment

Security code
Refresh

Alexander Gustafsson believes Jon Jones is doing whatever he can to not fight him

Alexander Gustafsson spells his last name with three consonants in a row and it's not even grammatically incorrect. That's the power of the Nords -- they have the power to...

04-17-2014 | Zeus @MiddleEasy | 9 Comments

This is Truly the Greatest Glitch Known to Man

If you’ve played The Wolf Among Us you know that Bigby Wolf is a serious kind of guy. He takes his job as sheriff very seriously and does his best...

04-16-2014 | Dave Walsh | 3 Comments

MMA with dirt bikes flying overhead, America wins AGAIN

As my overly hot actress neighbor who drunkenly stumbled into my apartment said: 'It's like Cage vs. Cons, but for the suburbanites that lost their virginity to Korn.' She's somewhat...

04-08-2014 | Zeus @MiddleEasy | 6 Comments

Guys, Jon Jones lost his cat. We need to help him.

I wouldn't wish losing a pet on my worst enemy. Actually, yes I would. I would wish that as long as I knew the pet would end up in the...

04-10-2014 | Jason Nawara | 12 Comments

Guy wins MMA fight with a reverse Boston crab, off his BACK!

Boston Bomber. Boston Tea Party. Boston Massacre. Boston Baked Beans. All of those variations of Bostonian things will get you killed, but only one of them will give you diabetes while...

04-07-2014 | Zeus @MiddleEasy | 5 Comments

You can pinpoint the exact moment these Phillies fans heart breaks

As a sports fan I've suffered a lot. It's well known that I've always been fond of Pride FC and their fighters, everyone gets old, and that's what has happened...

04-15-2014 | Gary LaPlante | 3 Comments

The Wolf Among Us: A Crooked Mile review

When it comes to episodic adventure games, we all know that Telltale has the market cornered. They’ve done a tremendous job of not only reviving the long-dormant genre, but modernizing...

04-08-2014 | Dave Walsh | No comments

Shots Fired! The first episode of the new TUF is already ripping into Bellator

Technically the new episode of The Ultimate Fighter: Team Penn vs. Team Edgar can claim that not even former Bellator champions can compete amongst the ranks of TUFers vying to...

04-17-2014 | Zeus @MiddleEasy | 7 Comments

Let's all watch Gina Carano's appearance on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson

If any of you find yourself in the middle of drag show in West Hollywood, just remember that ordering a drink from a shirtless bartender with a bow tie is...

04-08-2014 | Zeus @MiddleEasy | 6 Comments

Log In or Sign Up

Registrations are OPEN this week.

Log in with Facebook

Forgot your password? / Forgot your username?