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Phil Davis beats Glover Teixeira, calls out Anderson Silva. Twitter reacts!

UFC 179 was just fine despite the fact that the card was full of inconsequential fights between people we didn't know or care about. Then the main card started, and dragged on into an event that eventually devolved into Brian Stann talking about smiles, and how Glover Teixeira has the nicest one in combat sports. Well, we think Gennady Golovkin has the nicest smile, but that is neither here nor there, smile police. Or should I say, smile gustapo, you fascist (I'm speaking to Gary LaPlante right now).

Phil Davis went out and did what Phil Davis does, which was neutralize his opponents offense, work his wrestling and only strike when he knew he could be effective. It works out for him and he gets a good win in Brazil. Then, the real crux hits the last 20 minutes in the Octagon and we have something to write about. Phil Davis takes the mic, proclaims himself the Brazilian killer, then rescinds, saying he's a penitent man, humble. A penitent man kneels before God, kneel! But he doesn't and just says that he's beaten a lot of Brazilians, but not one certain Brazilian.

Then he calls out Anderson Silva.

Twitter reacts:

 

 

UFC 179 Spilled Bag of Picks

Spilled Bag of Ice (AKA SBOI) is an expert in many things. Love, spills, ice. He's also a master at prognosticating mixed martial arts battles inside geometrical shapes. 

That's why we pay him the big bucks to write his predictions down then show them to the world. Below is the UFC 179 Spileld Bag of Picks. Read and enjoy.

Fili vs Arantes 

Fili follows me on twitter and is a very likable guy. I'm pulling for him to win and celebrate with an obscene amount of pizza. There's no science to this guys! At the end of the day, you're mostly guessing. And guessing in favor for the guy that follows you on twitter is as good a method as any!
 
Jorgensen vs Reis
Three years ago Scott Jorgensen was knocking on the door of title contention and now he's just trying to stay in the UFC. I like "Young Guns" and I'm rooting for him but he's good at using his stand up to get it to the ground and get the sub. But in 23 fights, Reis has never been submitted and he has momentum on his side. I hate to do it but I think Reis gets the win.
 
Kotani vs Cabral
Two submission specialists square off. I'm not super familiar with either guy but neither guy is a KO artist so this is gonna likely come down to a submission or a decision. I have to go with Kotani who has more than FOUR TIMES the fights under his belt than Cabral. Sorry Brazilians.
 
Magny vs Macario
Macario has a win over Bobby Voelker and that's no small feat but Magny has more Octagon experience and has more ways to win. I'm going with Fuckin' Magnys, how do they work?!
 
Dariush vs Ferreira
Dariush is a likable guy. Talented yet humble. I'm rooting for him. If you look at their common opponent, Ramsey Nijem, Ferreira TKO'd him in 2nd round and Dariush got TKO'd by him in the 1st. So, I'm picking Dariush. Because sometimes your gut just says "Fuck it! Pick that guy anyway... Hey, let's go get a burrito." 
 
Elkins vs Martins
Martins is a finisher and he has more impressive wins. His lone loss coming to Barboza - and that guy is pretty good. I'm sorry Darren Elkins, but I can't chant USA, USA, USA! for this one. Sorry Americans. Martins gets the finish.
 
Maldonado vs Stringer
Maldonado looks like a cross between Homer Simpson and Fred Flintstone and he clearly hates combs. Stringer, no realtion to Stringer Bell, has an impressive record.... against a bunch of fighters with names that have two of the same vowel in a row. I wish I remembered his last fight... Uhh... Maldonado by losing the fight and then winning the fight. Yabba Dabba DOH!
 
Davis vs Teixeira
Phil Davis will dance away from Glover's punches then give him lots of cuddles on the ground and then he'll get the decision win. I think.
 
Aldo vs Mendes
Mendes had a great shot at beating Aldo last time they fought. But Aldo had a better shot -a knee to the DOME! KAPOW! OH SNAP! Will lightning strike twice? I doubt it and Mendes has since turned into a KO artist so he has an even better chance than he did nearly 3 years ago. And just like that. Every UFC Champion will be American. USA! USA! USA!  

Join Tito Ortiz, JZ Cavalcante and Christiane Justino in Phuket Dreaming Episode 6

It’s time to board a cerebral jetliner to Phuket again, that relatively small island off the west coast of Thailand with a wealth of per capita badassery. In this sixth installment by Genghis Con, Christiane “Cyborg” Justino prepares for a fight at the Sri Panwa Resort.

She trains at the sweeping edge of the Thai world, in what looks like an intense virtual salon spa. It makes you want to quit your job and board a cargo ship to the Far East. Of course, that tranquility is a bit of an illusion, given your long vacation would involve getting kicked in the leg about 10,000 times.

Enjoy some SUP surfing with JZ Cavalcante at Kata Beach, and watch Tito prepare for his fight with Stephan Bonnar.

We're marathoning through Civilization: Beyond Earth on MLG.TV ALL. DAY. LONG.

Today we welcome a new force into our lives that promises to throw any and all responsibilities we may or may not have out the window because today we welcome the newest installment of the Civilization series - Civilization: Beyond Earth. I’m sure most of you have experienced the power of the Just One More Turn… mechanic those games employ in order to leave you glued to your monitor, forgetting your body’s needs for food, water, and sleep. If you haven’t, now is a great time to start ruining your life by playing a game. It’s worth it, trust me.

Civilization: Beyond Earth uses the same old Civ gameplay mechanics we know and love and applies them to a (sort of) new setting. We’re going to be able to play as brand new civs colonizing a new planet after humanity pretty much screwed itself out of living on planet Earth. As always, Firaxis is introducing new stuff to their tried and true formula in order to keep the game fresh and evolving.

Our very own Dave Walsh is hosting a marathon that Jason, Matt, and a few other friends of MiddleEasy and I are going to jump in on that promises to leave us passed out on the floor from dehydration. That's right, we're gonna sacrifice our beautiful selves for your (and our) entertainment. At least those two have wives dogs to find them half dead on the floor and call 911. I’m probably just gonna die. Good bye. Before I die though, watch the me and the crew explore a whole new world and brand new gameplay!

This video will ramp up your anticipation for Bernard Hopkins vs. Sergey Kovalev

Bernard Hopkins will be 49 and 50 weeks old when he faces Sergey Kovalev for a light heavyweight unification bout. What we have is one of the most impressive athletes in all of sports history in Bernard Hopkins. Going up against a boxer who is one of the hardest punchers that we’ve seen in ages.

What makes this fight is interesting is the fact that Bernard Hopkins is a flawed fighter, he isn’t that active, he doesn’t have the power to put you away, he uses everything in his arsenal legal and illegal, yet he still wins. He doesn’t just win, he will take guys to school and make them look awful. A man of his age should not be able to do that to people nearly half his age in a sport where at his age, most fighters are not well off physically. Which is why you always see guys refuse to fight him, because even when you are victorious vs. Hopkins, you don’t look good doing it.

On the opposite side of the ring we have Sergey Kovalev, a man who well… this video will speak for itself:

He’s violence personified. A man who has struggled himself in getting high profile fights because of how vicious he is.

So the two men that no one wants to fight, for completely different reasons, are going to step into the ring together in nearly two weeks. We don’t get these types of fights often, not only is it an excellent fight, it’s a fight with an amazing narrative. A combination that we rarely get the chance to see, will Bernard Hopkins put on another boxing clinic and add onto his legacy, or will Sergey Kovalev continue the path of destruction that he’s on? We’ll find out soon enough.

This UFC 182 Jones vs. Cormier Promo is perfect

Pssss hey, injury bug are you still there? If you are injury bug please leave Jon Jones versus Daniel Cormier the hell alone! Nobody likes you injury bug. All you do is take injury bug and MMA fan's hearts cannot take anymore breaking. The possibility of Jon Jones and Daniel Cormier standing alone in the world famous Octagon brings about so many feelings.
 
On August 4, 2014 Jones and Cormier gave the MMA world pure glee. A stare down, a head butt, UFC PR front man Dave Sholler attempting a one man stage dive all in the span of 10 seconds had cage fighting fans squealing with joy. Cormier even tossed his dress shoe in the general direction of Jones. That's just good ol' fashion fight promotion right there.
 
Every great hype train needs a detour covered in "leaked" video footage. Silly ESPN you left your cameras and your microphones on while Jones and Cormier were waiting to be interviewed. Oh what's this? Jones said what? Two fighters threatening to murder each other in the name of the prestigious UFC 205 pound championship?
 
Breaking out the vintage "This is not promoting the fight. I really just want to kill you" prize fighting promotional tactic. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge somebody wants a few extra zeros on their UFC 182 pay per view bonus novelty check. Jones and Cormier gave human face punching fans raw anticipation.
 
MMA highlight maker extraordinaire @BrattMamley brings the heat with his latest trailer hyping the UFC 182 main event between the two best 205 pound men walking Earth. 
 

A primer on Aldo, Mendes and leg trauma

 Can you imagine what it takes to become a UFC champion? As a matter of fact, you are doing it right now. Your imagination knows no limits. You are so powerful. Unfortunately, for the large majority of us, our bodies have many limits and those limits stand like a boulder in the path to becoming a UFC champion or even an EA UFC champion. But who would want that anyway, right? It’s probably annoying being one of the baddest dudes on the planet. Having to sign autographs, be people’s hero, and wear that ridiculous belt that goes with NOTHING in your closet. I actually want to thank my gross body for doing me a favor by not letting me be tempted by championship gold.

This weekend, we have the opportunity to watch the 2nd most dominant (current) champion fight a mean ball of muscle and the general consensus is “borrrrrrring!” I get it. 66% of Jose Aldo’s title fights end in a decision and that is less exciting than Anderson’s 11%. When Joe Rogan tells me that Aldo is something like the most talented striker or a freak of nature (he must have said that at some point, I know it) and it doesn’t quite ring true, that makes me sad for myself. 

I love the thought that because a champion isn’t knocking guys (or girls, c’mon this is the 2010s, readers) out then they’re not trying hard enough. When I look at two fighters in the Octagon, it certainly looks like they’re fighting but they’re not. They’re playing a sport. They’re sporting each other with their fists. And in sports, if you win, you win, regardless of how you won. And if you win, you usually get more money. And if you get money, you can have happiness. UFC fighters want to win and have money. 2nd place on their list of priorities is entertainment (unless they are Donald Cerrone and he doesn’t give a fuck, his 1st and only priority is being the chilliest extreme dude west of the Mississippi). But, you say, we already know this and we hate it and now you!

 But, I say back right to your face, Jose Aldo decisions are different. First of all:

Second of all, among other people, he mostly fights Team Alpha Male and I will never miss one of those mini gorillas fight because they are all capable of Dillashaw-type upsets. So, even if you dislike Jose Aldo and his decisions, this is still the fight that you MUST WATCH because Mendes can give you exactly what you want to see.

If you need some help getting excited for Aldo vs. Mendes then watch this video and feel wrong:

HUNT WEEK: The time in 2012 every single person on the internet rallied around Mark Hunt

 

When internet MMA community needs hope they turn to Mark Hunt. A poet with his words and a painter with his fists, Hunt is Renaissance man who believe it or not one time needed help from the very fans that put him up on a pedestal. Everyone from old school forum commenters, fake MMA twitter profile makers, bros who actually just trained UFC, and aspiring regional ring card engineers joined together for a noble cause; to get Mark Hunt a UFC title shot!

Like all great cultural movements “Hunt for title shot” had an unofficial Twitter hashtag. Keyboards far and wide typed in 16 letters broken out into four words that simply read #RallyForMarkHunt. The spring of 2012 was a majestic time in the world of MMA. MMA fans all learned little something and everyone became a little better on the inside thanks to one Mark Richard Hunt of South Auckland, New Zealand.

MMA historian and video maker NickTheFace captured the snapshot in time with a single 53 second video.

Where the Hatred Began: Stephan Bonnar explains how Tito cost him about twenty bucks in 2001

"I can’t stand the guy, he’s a piece of sh*t,” says Stephan Bonnar about Tito Ortiz. Ah yes, Dr. Bonnar has transformed into Mr. American Psycho again.

Stephan Bonnar's persona lies somewhere between that of an eccentric college professor and the sort of guy who makes people uncomfortable on the subway. A fine ESPN analyst one moment, and a deranged fellow making fart noises in an Adam Corolla shirt the next.

He takes the second approach in this interview with Marcos Villegas of Fighthub.

“No more fakeness. Oh yeah, what an honor, he’s such a great champion.” Bonnar whines. “And a true *insert four fart noises* Everyone’s sick of hearing that. Guy’s a douchebag, and I can’t stand him.”

Aside from causing us to wonder whether Stephan has been toileting his neuroleptic medication, the most interesting part of this interview is the story about when his boundless hatred for Tito Ortiz began.

“It was UFC 33. First got back on PPV, it was a really exciting moment . . . and I had people over, I was so excited for it. And he was the main event, and he fought Vlad Matyushenko, and it was the boringest fight ever. The whole card sucked, but he could have saved it. He could have saved that card and didn’t. He chose to have the most boring fight ever, and then he paraded around afterwards like he was the greatest thing, and I had to defend this sport to my friends. I had to be like no, no, this sport, this is an awesome sport, trust me. They were like, ‘This is bullcrap, give me my five dollars back.’”

An impoverished Stephan Bonnar painfully handed people a few five dollar bills. “That’s where it started,” he concluded. One can’t help visualizing the tiny sparkling embers of a later immeasurable wrath.

The kiln of Bonnar’s hatred continued to warm as Tito acted out a series of jerkish scenarios. Like the time he “talked sh*t to Ken Slamcock.” Of course, Bonnar just insulted Ken there as well. But he’s the American Psycho, he gets to do that.

Given what happened in his living room almost fifteen years ago it is no surprise that Dana White gave Bonnar his blessing when he was invited to fight. “I hit him up, just over text and let him know I got a pretty crazy offer. That Bellator was interested in me fighting Tito. Obviously I didn’t want to burn any bridges, and wanted to know what he thought of it. He wished me the best in beating the shit out of him and making a lot of money.”

Bonnar and Ortiz fight at Bellator 131 on November 15th, in San Diego, California.

We blast into the past so hard it's the future: Ronda Rousey and Cat Zingano stare down for the first time

MMA in the past few years has been a tire fire of fights that should’ve been. If you think about it, it’s much like The Simpsons and their legendary tire fire.

It’s a problem that the city of Springfield just ignores and we as MMA fans just can’t seem to ignore. To this day people still talk about fights that have passed us by. People are STILL talking about Fedor vs. Brock, they are still talking about Anderson vs. GSP. Yet MMA fans just aren’t happy as a whole, granted not everyone is miserable with the state of MMA, but the majority of fans are and this is a problem. MMA fans are hooked on the past and while things may have been more entertaining back then, reminiscing about the past, yearning for the days that are no longer, will do no one any good.

Maybe as MMA fans, we should take a page out of The Simpsons. Maybe we should ignore the tire fire, maybe we should just pretend it’s not there and just go on with our lives. What I’m trying to say is, maybe we should just cherish the little positives that MMA gives us, no matter how few and far between they are.

Look, Ronda vs. Cat didn’t happen when it was suppose to happen, they had a staredown which might as well have happened in the SEG days. Now, we are finally getting that fight, so why not relive the magic of the first time Ronda and Cat stared down and get excited? Yeah?

 

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